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    General discussion Chatter, desires, jokes & rants; some threads are banter some are serious - please show respect for others Add RSS Feed

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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:00 PM   #1 (permalink)
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    Got A Complaint ?

    This is a list of council tenants genuine complaints ;


    1. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

    2. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

    3. And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

    4. I wish to report that the tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was that bad wind the other night that blew them off.

    5. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

    6. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path, my wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant?

    7. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen. 50% of them are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and the rest are plain filthy.

    8. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

    9. Will you please send a man to look at my water? It is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

    10. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

    11. I want to complain about the farmer across the road, every morning at 6:00am his !!!! wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.

    12. The man next door has a large erection in the garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

    13. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two small children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.

    14. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night.

    15. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

    16. I have had the clerk of the works down on the floor six times but I still have had no satisfaction.

    17. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus in it.

    18. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it any more.
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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:01 PM   #2 (permalink)
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    What do you do for a job
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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:11 PM   #3 (permalink)
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    Originally Posted by arbitor View Post
    What do you do for a job
    She must be a council worker!
    Any one else want to complain?
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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:28 PM   #4 (permalink)
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    You deal with housing benefit?

    Those lot are USELESS. The amount of time it takes for the council to sort it out the property is gone, happens every day...
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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:56 PM   #5 (permalink)
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    Nope dont work for any of the above .
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    Old 25-07-2007, 08:58 PM   #6 (permalink)
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    Ok cool
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    Old 25-07-2007, 09:24 PM   #7 (permalink)
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    Originally Posted by kickstart 1 View Post
    Nope dont work for any of the above .
    Originally Posted by arbitor View Post
    Ok cool
    hahaha,



    i really like these actually, we need more of this stuff, more weird error messages, more stupid warnings on stuff you buy and LESS crap jokes.

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    Old 25-07-2007, 09:29 PM   #8 (permalink)
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    They made me laugh - thanks for posting!
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    Old 25-07-2007, 09:37 PM   #9 (permalink)
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    Awesome ... They made me really laugh.

    All Hail the AACS : 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
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    Old 25-07-2007, 10:49 PM   #10 (permalink)
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    Funny

    Not 'genuine', but funny all the same.
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    Old 26-07-2007, 07:08 AM   #11 (permalink)
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    Originally Posted by autopilot View Post
    Funny

    Not 'genuine', but funny all the same.
    And yet most of them could have been.

    All Hail the AACS : 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
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    Old 26-07-2007, 11:53 AM   #12 (permalink)
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    Well the above could be found funny, it all depends on how screwed up your brain is

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    Old 26-07-2007, 12:27 PM   #13 (permalink)
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    Originally Posted by kickstart 1 View Post
    11. I want to complain about the farmer across the road, every morning at 6:00am his c0ck wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.
    slight edit so the censoring doesnt spoil the joke

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