Friday Joke

[Zak33]

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in Solihull Town Centre , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
"That's nice", she thinks, "but I want more."
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.



PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

[r_j_k_p]

LOL loving it
will tell the girlfriend it, and see what she thinks

[santa claus]

Two builders go into the pub after a hard day's work. After a while a very smartly dressed man walks in and orders a drink. The two began to speculate about what the man did for a living. "I'll bet he's an accountant." said the first builder.

"Looks more like a stockbroker to me." argued the second. They continued to debate the subject for a good while until eventually the first builder needed to use the toilet. On walking in, he saw the smartly dressed man standing at a urinal.

"Excuse me mate, but me and my friend have been arguing over what a smartly dressed fella like you does for a living?" the builder said to the man.

Smiling the man replied, "I'm a logical scientist."

"A what?" asked the builder.

"Let me explain" the man continued, "Do you have a goldfish at home?"

A bit puzzled, but intrigued the builder decided to play along, "Yes, I do as it happens."

"Well then it's logical to assume that you either keep it in a bowl or a pond. Which is it?"

"A pond" the builder replied.

"Well then it's logical to assume that you have a large garden." The builder nodded his agreement. So the man continued, "which means it's logical to assume you have a large house."

"I have a 6 bedroom house that I built myself." the builder said proudly.

"Given that you have such a large house, it's logical to assume that you are married..."

The builder nodded again, "Yes, I'm married and we have three children."

"Then it's logical to assume that you have a healthy sex life."

"Five nights a week!" the builder boasted.

The man smiled a little, "Therefore it's logical to assume you don't masturbate often."

"Never!" the builder exclaimed.

"Well there you have it" the man explained, "That's logical science at work. From finding out that you have a goldfish, I've discovered the size of your garden, all about your house, your family and your sex life!"

The builder left, very impressed by the man's talent.

On returning to the bar the other builder asked, "I see that smart bloke was in there, did you find out what he does?"

"Yeah," replied the first, "He's a logical scientist.

"A what?" the puzzled second builder asked.

"Let me explain" the first builder continued, "Do you have a goldfish at home?"

"No" replied his mate.

"Well, you're a w@nker."

[Behemoth]

A young couple were just moving into their new home, they had literally everything you could think of in the house as he had a fantastic job.

One day the young wife complaied that she didn't have enough gadgets in the kitchen, so the husband duly went out and bought her everything, food processor, liquidiser, juice, George Forman grill, smoothie maker, sandwhich toaster.

Over joyed by this she wisked him upstairs to do the old humpty dumpty.

Some weeks later the young wife started moaning that she had no room for all her kitchen gadgets, so the husband bought her an electric chair.

Someone call me a taxi lol

[Zak33]

The Friday joke thread is alive and well

[Behemoth]

An old coupe sitting in their rocking chairs watching the world go by, the old man says

"Whatever happened to our secual relations dear ?"

The wife looked over to him and then replied

"I have no idea, we didn't even get a chirstmas card from them this year"

[Zak33]

Behemoth...you're more drunk that I....you miss spelled couple (you typed coupe!!) and sexual.....with a c.

Remarkabe dear chap.....remarkable

[Allen]

Originally Posted by Behemoth

A young couple were just moving into their new home, they had literally everything you could think of in the house as he had a fantastic job.

One day the young wife complaied that she didn't have enough gadgets in the kitchen, so the husband duly went out and bought her everything, food processor, liquidiser, juice, George Forman grill, smoothie maker, sandwhich toaster.

Over joyed by this she wisked him upstairs to do the old humpty dumpty.

Some weeks later the young wife started moaning that she had no room for all her kitchen gadgets, so the husband bought her an electric chair.

Someone call me a taxi lol

7 days of earlies in a row has made me like a walking zombie, so I blame that, but I really don't get this joke...

[idimmu]

lol. friday jokes are still funny on saturday

[Behemoth]

Originally Posted by Zak33

Behemoth...you're more drunk that I....you miss spelled couple (you typed coupe!!) and sexual.....with a c.

Remarkabe dear chap.....remarkable

Thats what happens when you type too fast and not bother to check for errors.