Commuting

[MrRockliffe]

I speed walk to the station. It's about a mile and a half to 2 miles and I do it in around 40 minutes overtaking everyone and anyone. I have to get that train so if need be I'll jog.

[ik9000]

Someone on HEXUS once called me a bit of a grouch. Thinking about it, it was probably me that said it.

But if anyone thinks I'm grumpy on here, you don't want to see me commuting, when I used to commute into London. Put it this way, the Grim Reaper himself would take one look at my snarl and get the hell out of my way.

I stopped commuting (and I don't mean my current commute to the home office) about the time I decided the perfect commuter accessory was a flame-thrower. I am not a happy commuter.

I have long thought that upon holding a yearly tube travel card for 3 consecutive years, with records showing it has been used for daily commuting purposes, said card holders should be entitled to be sent, and then use, their own personal TFL branded riot shields. This would include for purposes of:

1)barging through the crowd of muppets waiting on the platform and preventing you from exiting the train
2)displacing clueless/ignorant/stubborn people who stand on the left on escalators
3)deflecting wheely suitcases blocking the platform/aisle/etc
4)carving through tourist party groups walking 8-abreast 20-ranks deep and dawdling along the pavement
5)ramming through the defective tube entry gates that close on you before you have gone through
6)preserving one's ability to breathe when moronic people from 1) then all try to board the train Tokyo style even when there is clearly NO MORE ROOM
7)extending in front of idiot cyclists who think red lights and zebra crossings are only optional and not intended for letting pedestrians cross in safety. About head -height should do it. Preferably side-on for extra bite.
8)sledging on in winter when the tubes and busses stop because of the white stuff

[Saracen]

I have long thought that upon holding a yearly tube travel card for 3 consecutive years, with records showing it has been used for daily commuting purposes, said card holders should be entitled to be sent, and then use, their own personal TFL branded riot shields. This would include for purposes of:

1)barging through the crowd of muppets waiting on the platform and preventing you from exiting the train
2)displacing clueless/ignorant/stubborn people who stand on the left on escalators
3)deflecting wheely suitcases blocking the platform/aisle/etc
4)carving through tourist party groups walking 8-abreast 20-ranks deep and dawdling along the pavement
5)ramming through the defective tube entry gates that close on you before you have gone through
6)preserving one's ability to breathe when moronic people from 1) then all try to board the train Tokyo style even when there is clearly NO MORE ROOM
7)extending in front of idiot cyclists who think red lights and zebra crossings are only optional and not intended for letting pedestrians cross in safety. About head -height should do it. Preferably side-on for extra bite.
8)sledging on in winter when the tubes and busses stop because of the white stuff

Well-met, soul brother.

Think we're related?

[OilSheikh]

I hope it doesn't become something like this in the video, find it quite similar getting off Embankment station commuting back home.

Or this :

[Nipun]

I am going with buses. rarely go with trains.

[wasabi]

12 mins leisurely walk of 10 if I'm late. Biggest hazard is dogwalkers stopping to pick up poop.

Taking local job means getting a big chunk of my life back.

Used to take the motorbike it when I worked 12 miles away - the only way to beat gridlocked traffic.

[TheAnimus]

I start my commute at the moment with a brisk walk to the kitchen after getting dressed, at which point I grind some beans, then prepare some espresso, whilst the machine is warming up I'll boot my PCs. Whilst looking at my phone for anything more urgent I'll squeeze some orange juice and decide what it is for breakfast.

The joys of having a home office for 70%+ of the week!

The other days I try to cycle.

[MeridiusBeta]

Honestly, I just leave in good time, merrily strolling along, and mentally pointing and laughing at people sprinting for the train.

Of course, if it's particularly busy, I just make my way onto the train without concern for others. Old lady with heavy luggage will have to catch the next one. Ahem.

[Smudger]

I've noticed something else that really grinds my gears: people who pause before getting on escalators. I used to think it was just women that did it, but I've noticed men doing it as well.

You can put your foot on gap between the escalator plates, then move it off once they start rising/falling, numbnutses...

[OilSheikh]

There also seems to be a lack of people wearing deodrants or body sprays these days. TFL needs to invest in having pine trees tied to every pole (?) in every carriage.

I had a funny encounter this morning. Gentleman standing near the door, but letting everyone else off the train. I am behind him and telling him if I can be excused and let past and he tells me - There is a queue. Not sure if he was ultra nice or naive

[Splash]

I've noticed something else that really grinds my gears: people who pause before getting on escalators. I used to think it was just women that did it, but I've noticed men doing it as well.

You can put your foot on gap between the escalator plates, then move it off once they start rising/falling, numbnutses...

More annoying are those who stop at the top immediately after getting off.

[Dooms]

So glad I don't have to use public transport much these days - Cycle power ftw even in the dark & cold.

One thing that used to make me so angry when commuting on the train/tubes in London is: Everyone off the trains, heading to barriers, couple minute wait to get to barrier, guy in front get there and then "Oh where's my ticket!" ... FFS MAN WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN QUEING FOR THE LAST 3 MINUTES!

[j.o.s.h.1408]

How do you behave when you commute ?

I speed walk to my station , overtaking everyone else who is walking in front of me and also heading to the station. My oystercard is in my hand even ebfore I reach the station. I then do a split second overtaking to make sure I get through the barriers before the next guy who is about to. As I am passing through the barriers, I do a U dance as I gracefully go through!

On the platform, I have already memorized
- which carriage normally has empty seats
- where does this carriage stop
- at which part of the platform should I stand at so that the doors for this carriage open up in front of me and I am the first one to get on the carriage

At anytime, I like peace and quiet on my commute. I eye any chicks on the carriage. Then, I sleep Business-class style : Legs stretched across the carriage and my upper body at a 45 degrees comfort position.

If there's anyone who is playing their music loudly ( mostly it's Africans / British Africans / East Europeans ), I give them a dirty I WILL RIP YOU APART look and I keep staring at them until they reduce their music volume. If they don't, I get my phone out, go sit next to them and play the Modern Warfare 2 Spec Ops theme or the Etihad Airways boarding theme , just so I can pis them off. Obese people are also uncomfortable to sit next to. You feel squashed and unable to move your arms.

When getting off at my destination station, again, I position myself in front of the door that will be nearest to the exit. If I am on a carriage which is far away from the exit, I jump out of the carriage like Batman and then run for the exit zooming past everyone!

If you have to catch a 2nd connecting train and your 1st train has just arrived, indicate with your hands ( like the signal guy on a aircraft carrier ) to people who crowd up near the doors : CLEAR out of the way. I need to GO straight.

While walking to work, I like to avoid these types of slow coaches :
- Old ladies
- Tall men ( they walk like Peter Crouch .. takes big strides but slowly )
- Fat men/women
- Ladies wearing heels

Only ladies who wear boots seem to be good at this. They take long strides and walk fast as well!

If someone is trying to overtake you, don't let them pass you.They will get in front of you and slow you down.

Timing is everything

Try that dirty look at me and watch me return the favour

[OilSheikh]

Try that dirty look at me and watch me return the favour

That did not sound very civil. I shall assume you will try to imitate the dirty look.

[j.o.s.h.1408]

That did not sound very civil. I shall assume you will try to imitate the dirty look.

Indeed or stick a middle finger lol. Its got to be whisper silent nowadays for you to hear someone's music in headfones.

Some people are annoying and just any slight noise and they got berserk as if someone nailed you down your seat and put a pair of headphones on you and set the volume in full banging out the most annoying song ever

[Moby-Dick]

That did not sound very civil. I shall assume you will try to imitate the dirty look.

In all fairness it seems no worse than the level of obnoxiousness that you seem to be almost proud of.