Bloody horseboxes!

[Howard]

ROFL

[Zak33]

Well....I for one must partially defend rachel_e_s....before I let go my angst!

Firstly.....people with horses ARE human and she proves that they're not all called Jemima or Tarquin.

Secondly, horses are , by their very nature, cool and lovely and I like them

And thirdly....they do cost a BLOODY fortune, and anyone on a small income, that has one and keeps is well, is a hero.

/deep breath....


HOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWeverrrrrr

Normally, the fact that the neddy takes all that persons income normally reusults in:

Buying all their clothes at either a second hand tack-shop or a market, resulting, in either case, in a large collection of leggings. None of which make their bum look as small as a well fitted pair of Next jeans would. At all.

It makes the person in question talk, and live, horses 100%, and not be able to relax at any moment of the night or day, because they might get a call about an electric storm somewhere off Northern Ireland that might make it to mainland Britain and might make the horse run around a lot, trying to get hit by lightning. So you cant sleep.

And the last thing is....Horse Box insurance and plating (that's an MOT guys....so dont get excited)

Horse boxes are without a doubt, huge. Even small ones are huge. Cos even small horses are huge.

And because they only come out onto the roads occassionally, they clock up low miles and can only hit a certain amount of cars, in one year. Makin the insurance quite cheap. These accidents dont seem to effect horse boxes insurance like they do car insurance. I'm not sure why......but they do hit a lot of things. However.... None of this is EVER the horse box owners fault.

Ever.

Even the ones they side swipe, reverse into, or just T bone because the brakes are so ropey.

And as for getting them started......BATTERIES......batteries on horse boxes, that dont get used for 3 months at a time are ALWAYS flat. And need jumping...hence the horsebox owners fright at stopping....even at nasty junctions. Why do you think they pull out infront of moving traffic? They're scared of stalling and then Joshua and Emily have got to jump out and stop eating cakes, and push 4 tons on horse box while Petunia pops the clutch...in the wrong gear....7 times.

How do I know all this?

Dont ask....but I did a lot of mucking out when I was younger....a lot of box edges in straw beds, I skipped out a lot of beds, and I drove these death traps.

/shivvers.

Dont talk to ME about horses. Lovely animals ...but the owners....mad. All mad.

[Flibb]

Think there is something the matter with you lot. Have been involved with "horsey" type people for years. Generally they are
1. Female
2. Young
3. Fit, if you can wrestle a horse in to submission with your thighs you have to be fit.
4. Wear skin tight semi transparent trousers.
5. Wear leather boots.
6. Carry a a whip.

Sounds good to me.

[TiG]

Originally Posted by Flibb

Think there is something the matter with you lot. Have been involved with "horsey" type people for years. Generally they are
1. Female
2. Young
3. Fit, if you can wrestle a horse in to submission with your thighs you have to be fit.
4. Wear skin tight semi transparent trousers.
5. Wear leather boots.
6. Carry a a whip.

Sounds good to me.

lol

[Nick]

Dude, yes, for sure horsey types have thighs that can crumble marble but seriously, when I see them with their horses I'm never quite sure as to which one I should feed the carrot...

[ponolops]

Will someone pleeeeeeeeeeeease take the batteries out of Nick and Zak33 before they (or I) explode!!!!!!

SHUT. UP!

[Nick]

Is this abuse of a Mod? Can I ban her now?

[Funkstar]

Personally i don't think you would dare Nick

[James Griffiths]

Hi nick I have a 7.5 tonne horse box and three horse's I find that most people who dont like horse's and horse box's is because they cant afford them !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks James

[Rishi]

Originally Posted by James Griffiths

Hi nick I have a 7.5 tonne horse box and three horse's I find that most people who dont like horse's and horse box's is because they cant afford them !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks James

You been sniffing glue?

Its got nothing to do with wealth, its about these "things" taking up the road and slowing down peoples lives!

How much is a horse these days anyways?

[Funkstar]

Originally Posted by Rishi

How much is a horse these days anyways?

About £1 per KG as far as i can find. Available in a variety of cuts

[schmunk]

Originally Posted by Rishi

How much is a horse these days anyways?

Dead or alive?

[Nick]

Originally Posted by James Griffiths

Hi nick I have a 7.5 tonne horse box and three horse's I find that most people who dont like horse's and horse box's is because they cant afford them !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks James

Thanks James... that pretty much wraps up my case.

Of course, I am left wondering exactly who, out of you and the horses, is the more blinkered...

btw, you do have the required EU Equine Passport for each animal, yes? Just in case you decide to 'turn a bit French'...

[chrestomanci]

There was a column about horseboxes in the Sunday Express magazine this week.

The columnist had brought a horse, and to transport it, a horse box to tow behind her Chelsea tractor. The horse hates being transported in the horse box (who wouldn’t), but the owner does not care much.

Problem is, the owner can’t reverse park the horse box, so she will turn up at a horsey event, with the horse ready to kick a the door of the box down, just to escape the moving torture chamber it has been put in, but the owner can’t find a space big enough to drive into (and be able to drive out of), so she drives the poor creature home instead of accept help parking the thing.

Now I know that reversing with a trailer is tricky, but in that situation, you or I would take a few lessons, or perhaps go to a supermarket car park late at night and practice a bit. Instead our dear columnist reports that she has brought a 7.5 ton lorry, with a kitchen and room for 3 horses.

Basically, because she can’t drive properly, and won’t learn she has decided to block up the roads and destroy the planet even more than she was already.