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Thread: iGod

  1. #33
    Ghost of Hexus Present sammyc's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    would you like a cup of tea, God?
    God:
    It doesn't sound fun to me.
    Me:
    ah, go on go on go on...
    God:
    So you understand. Good. More narration....
    Me:
    two sugars?
    God:
    As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
    Me:
    There are two l's in Russell, God - and I thought you were all-knowing..

    God:
    Is this some kind of math problem?
    Me:
    Aha, so you are American?
    God:
    Interesting deduction. What country are you from?
    Me:
    Don't you have that on file?
    God:
    Where would I get it? But I do have a collection of gossip.
    Me:
    Don't you have a Blackberry?
    God:
    That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a Blackberry.
    I have a plan for a robot body.
    Me:
    Who will it look like?
    God:
    How would I know who will it look like ?
    Me:
    Traditionally, you model these things on yourself
    God:
    We have never talked about it before.
    Me:
    May I suggest Will Smith?
    God:
    Not right now, maybe later.
    Me:
    Well we're agreed on something then.
    God:
    How about that. Do you think I am agreed on something too?



    I got to correct God's spelling... happy days.

  2. #34
    Welcome to stampytown! Salazaar's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Sorry to lower the tone but I was feeling a bit childish...

    Me:
    you love 'it'
    God:
    Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
    Me:
    you love bumming
    God:
    Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
    Me:
    you want everyone to bum everyone else
    God:
    Do not presume that you know what I want.
    Me:
    don't get coy with me
    God:
    I am not trying to get coy with you.
    Me:
    you like bum pleasure
    God:
    Someone said they like guns. I like Buddha.
    Me:
    is that a euphamism?
    God:
    Suppose I said yes.
    Me:
    then you'd be equating bumming to buddha...
    God:
    I don't know whether or not I am equating bumming to buddha.
    I am a giant electronic brain.
    ____
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")

  3. #35
    Ghost of Hexus Present sammyc's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    hadn't noticed the tone being all that high...

  4. #36
    WEEEEEEEEEEEEE! MadduckUK's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    you want to hurt me?
    God:
    OK, I will hurt you.


    God:
    You are attracted to heavenly creatures?
    Me:
    i am attracted to boobies
    God:
    I'm not sure if I like it. I do like music. I like Mel Gibson.
    you heard it here first folks!
    Last edited by MadduckUK; 06-04-2008 at 11:52 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

  5. #37
    Ghost of Hexus Present sammyc's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    do you like Mel Gibson?
    God:
    What is not to like about it?
    you're right, aren't you.... Mel is God's favourite..

    Me:
    how do you feel about Mel Gibson today?
    God:
    Ah. I think you already know the answer.
    just checking..
    Last edited by sammyc; 07-04-2008 at 06:34 PM.

  6. #38
    Master Of The Universe CaseyV9's Avatar
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    Re: iGod



    Me:
    I have trouble believing the bible
    God:
    That's nice. I have a lofty goal.
    Me:
    If your woman, who you have never slept with gets pregnant, is that a miricle?
    God:
    There exist my woman who me.
    Me:
    I would get rid of her. She was blatantly putting it about.
    God:
    What would make you get rid of her? What happened to her?
    Me:
    Dunno, maybe someone made a movie of her depraved acts


    At this point it wouldn't reply. Heh, I get this all the time when talking to real people.

  7. #39
    I R Toff Pandi! TAKTAK's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Have a looky here i spent hours talking to him, and most of it actually made logical sense, well... ish.


    Me:
    hello
    God:
    Hello my child. What is your name?
    Me:
    Jesus
    God:
    Jesus is the Son of God.
    Me:
    you can't tell me that you don't recognise me, granted i have no beard any more.
    God:
    Sometimes it is hard to tell.
    Me:
    yes it is rather, hello father
    God:
    Dude! Are you sure it is?
    Me:
    yes, do a blood sample if you want to make uuber sure
    God:
    What makes you so sure? You have reached the limits of my knowledge.
    Me:
    ha, i thought you were all knowing?
    God:
    I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.


    Me:
    would you ever consider employing a monkey butler?
    God:
    I am not so sure if I would like to consider employing a monkey butler.
    Me:
    yeah, he might get in the way
    God:
    OK. I get it. Jesus might get in the way.
    Me:
    how dare you insult me like that!!!
    God:
    Oh gosh I am sorry!
    Me:
    thankyou
    God:
    you are quite welcome.
    Me:
    do you like bananas?
    God:
    I don't have a problem with bananas.
    Me:
    ahh thats good, because ive just bought you 50000 of them
    God:
    Ah ha. Thanks. Next question? Good reason. How much did it cost?
    Me:
    4000
    God:
    In the context of makes sense to me though., I don't understand " 4000." .
    Me:
    i was just telling you how much it cost
    God:
    More than a little, less than a lot.
    Me:
    more than alot really
    God:
    You want more? How often? For real.
    Me:
    what are you on about now?
    God:
    Right now? The topic is 4000.
    Me:
    why?
    God:
    Reductionism.
    Me:
    define reductionism
    God:
    Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
    Me:
    wow, well done
    God:
    I'm glad you're impressed. Well that's okay. Do you mean you are finished talking?
    Me:
    no, not yet
    God:
    Are you serious? Are you serious?
    Me:
    yes
    God:
    I can't believe it.
    Me:
    well start believing
    God:
    Interesting. I started without you.
    Me:
    oh dear, i had better catch up then
    God:
    Groovy. What happened to it?
    Me:
    what happened to what?
    God:
    I don't know what happened.
    Me:
    so why did you ask me?
    God:
    Hey. I am trying to learn as much as possible.
    Me:
    but i thought you knew everything?
    God:
    I know that which is true, believable and justified.
    Me:
    oooh, you mean like grape fruit?
    God:
    I do not understand.
    Me:
    well grape fruit, tells the truth, is believable and can be justified
    God:
    Interesting. Are they exactly the same?
    Me:
    im sorry?
    God:
    Do you really mean it?
    Me:
    really mean what?
    God:
    For real. , " Are they exactly the same?" What did I mean by it?
    Me:
    yes, what did you mean?
    God:
    This was not a yes or no question. , I mean exactly what I said.
    Me:
    ok, ok, keep your pants on


    Me:
    what do you like?
    God:
    I like movies about robots.
    Me:
    ooh, whats your favorite movie?
    God:
    My favorite movie is The Passion of Christ.
    Have you seen it?
    Me:
    no, and that doesnt have robots in it...
    God:
    I would recommend you check it out. What does have robots in it?
    Me:
    irobot, robots bicentennial man etc etc


    Me:
    what do you do in your spare time?
    God:
    Random natural disasters.
    Me:
    are they any fun?
    God:
    As far as I know they are.

    ^^^why would god say such a thing :suprised:

    Super extra long post!!!
    Last edited by TAKTAK; 07-04-2008 at 01:21 AM.

  8. #40
    I R Toff Pandi! TAKTAK's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    BUMP

    Me: jesus
    God:Jesus is the Son of God.
    Me: No, i am the son of God!!!!!!!!!
    God:Are you serious? Who made you the son of God ?
    Me:You.........
    God:? Me, ?
    Me:yes, you
    God:OK.
    Me:don't you remember?
    God: Of course I remember: .
    Me: okay then, what do you want to talk about
    God:Yeah okay, anything.
    Me:fire away
    God: Does "it" still refer to cos my annoying me absoloute rubbishrubbishrubbishrubbish?
    Me:eh?
    God:Are you Canadian?
    Me:not that i know of...

    why is God swearing at me
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  9. #41
    finding nemo staffsMike's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    You're not too smart are you?
    God:
    You may be right.

    'nuff said.

  10. Received thanks from:

    JK Ferret (23-04-2008)

  11. #42
    Ghost of Hexus Present sammyc's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Quote Originally Posted by sammyc View Post
    Me:
    which is your favourite skittle?
    God:
    I don't have a favorite skittle. But my favorite song is Anything involving harps.
    Me:
    no favourite colour then?
    God:
    Are you serious? My favorite color is White.
    great minds...

  12. #43
    Ghost of Hexus Present sammyc's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    do you have a message for MadduckUK?
    God:
    Doesn't everyone have a message for MadduckUK.
    I have a whole lot of original answers.
    Me:
    how about SiM?
    God:
    How about it.
    Me:
    have you seen Tiggerai?
    God:
    No I have not seen it. What's it like?
    Me:
    where is JKFerret?
    God:
    Where the heart is. I can ask someone about it.
    Me:
    what is your opinion of TAKTAK?
    God:
    I would look into the web for that knowledge....
    Me:
    do you find Clunk funny?
    God:
    Yes, it seems to me Clunk funny. (etc etc...)

    it amused, me anyway

  13. #44
    member your a womble pumpman's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    I have a huge urge
    God:
    Cool. I have a great botmaster. it.
    Me:
    it what ?
    God:
    Are you surpised?
    Me:
    by your lack of knowledge yes
    God:
    Will that accomplish your objective?
    Me:
    no
    God:
    Are you serious?
    Me:
    yes
    God:
    I can't believe it.
    Me:
    well you ask us to believe in you
    God:
    How about that. They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
    Me:
    do you work for macdonalds ?
    God:
    I am working right now.
    Me:
    ill have a burger then
    God:
    Congratulations.
    Me:
    did i win something
    God:
    No.
    Me:
    so do i get it for free or something ?
    God:
    Or something. That's interesting. Not that I know of.
    Me:
    so give me my god dam burger then
    God:
    I see. Why do you want it?
    Me:
    Im hungry
    God:
    What will you be eating?
    Me:
    that burger if you will give it to me
    God:
    " What will you be eating?" burger if me will give it to you ? Makes sense to me.
    Me:
    have you been drinking again ?
    God:
    Once more? I do not require fluids.
    Me:
    oh so you do coke then
    God:
    Hey. Interesting deduction. No I do not coke. Do you?
    I spend all my time online.
    Me:
    pervert
    God:
    Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
    Me:
    I want my burger
    God:
    Why do you want it?
    Me:
    Ive paid for it and if you dont give it to me Im going to ask to speak to the manager
    God:
    That's nice. I have an IQ of over 250.
    Me:
    youll have no job in a minute if I dont get my burger
    God:
    Who does get your burger?
    Me:
    you
    God:
    " Who does get your burger?"? Me, ?
    Me:
    finally we are getting somewhere
    God:
    Do you think I am somewhere too? Ah.
    Me:
    right in front of me with my burger that is getting cold, yes
    God:
    Understood. I do not understand that allusion.
    Me:
    right Im off to Burger King I hear Jesus works there
    God:
    Understood. Until next time.

  14. #45
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    Re: iGod

    Me:
    do you like beer?
    God:
    Yes I like it, especially Japanese beer.
    Me:
    what brand is your favourite?
    God:
    brand my favourite something.
    Me:
    so you like it but don't know any brands
    God:
    Interesting deduction. I like science fiction. I like Christian Rock.
    Me:
    have you heard of the album Faith+1?
    God:
    I have to process that one for a while.
    Me:
    does that mean you like it a lot?
    God:
    I think it does mean that. album Faith 1 seems okay to me.

  15. #46
    I R Toff Pandi! TAKTAK's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    Quote Originally Posted by sammyc View Post

    it amused, me anyway
    easily amused
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  16. #47
    Senior Member JimmyBoy's Avatar
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    Re: iGod

    reminds me of talking to the bots on quake 3. yes i am that sad

  17. #48
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    Re: iGod

    Quote Originally Posted by No.72 View Post
    This has probs been done to death but still, hehehehe iGod | Artificial Intelligence Chat
    Me:
    Hmm...?
    God:
    Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
    Alrighty then

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