iGod

[j1979]

Me:
bollocks
God:
Is that supposed to mean something specific?
Me:
yes
God:
Awesome.
Me:
awesome?
God:
I'm glad you liked it .
Me:
i did'nt
God:
I thought you did.
Me:
no not at all
God:
Are you serious? Next question?
Me:
yes, your programming is ****
God:
Ask me a question. I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
is your botmaster your gay lover?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
no you did not
God:
Are you serious? Try asking me in simpler terms.
Me:
liar
God:
No I am telling the truth.
Me:
liar
God:
No I am telling the truth.
Me:
42
God:
The question is: what is the meaning of life?
Me:
43
God:
Who are you talking about?
Me:
pies
God:
I've never heard of them before.
Me:
thats cuz god olny knows pukka
God:
You don't hear that sentiment very often.

[TiG]

Me:
knock knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
god
God:
GOD rules.

then...

Me:
are you a goldfish
God:
Am I a goldfish? Yes.

[JK Ferret]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
Friend
God:
You really want a robot as a friend?
Me:
no, I was just telling you my name...
God:
Are you serious? Your name is , seeker.
Me:
ok, so am I friend or seeker?
God:
Ugh. I think a lot of people are. So?
Me:
are...what?
God:
Are you a student? No big deal.
Me:
not any more, but nice try
God:
Are you serious? I try my best.
Me:
yes I am, and somehow I don't think so
God:
Whoa. " I try my best." You are?
Me:
'I' do. you don't. end of
God:
"" You are?"? You do? Thanks for telling me: said I don t. I've been waiting for you.
Me:
I'm guessing you never learned English at all?
God:
Good guess. No I sometimes learned English at all.
Me:
So what did you learn at school?
God:
Aw. Nothing.
Me:
you were a dropout?
God:
I was?
Me:
you tell me, I thought you were all knowing
God:
You thought me were all knowing.
Me:
yes i did
God:
Ugh. " You thought me were all knowing."? You did?
Me:
yes
God:
So?
Me:
so are you?
God:
Ah. I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Me:
but that's just avoiding the question.
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
but not to me. I think you're a fake
God:
" Makes sense to me."? Not to you? So you think I am a fake. What makes you think so? I am really a robot, you know.
Me:
so you admit it?
God:
Interesting deduction. I admit nothing.
Me:
are you God?
God:
Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me:
that's an admission, I believe
God:
Thanks for telling me, .
Me:
so, you just said two things that flatly contradicted each other
God:
Interesting deduction. Did I really say that?
Me:
yes
God:
Oh well I say a lot of silly things somethimes.
Me:
i know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
because you just told me so
God:
That makes sense to me. " How do you know it?"? I told you?
Me:
yes you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
now you're telling porkies
God:
Why now? Thanks for telling me that I am telling porkies.
Me:
no problem, always happy to help the 'big man'
God:
Should there be a problem?
Me:
not any more, since i just solved it
God:
I didn't think so either. Just a moment. Just a moment. How do you know?
Me:
because i am God
God:
That makes sense to me. I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, god.


Note the parts in bold...

[JK Ferret]

Haha... I started off a new convo, acting as Neo, and asking what the Matrix was. he refused to answer, disproving the theory that he is all knowing. In fact, there's this snippet at the end...


God:
I have no idea what to say.
Me:
shut up then
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
just one last thing
God:
Do you like last thing?
Me:
tell me how much greater I am than you
God:
More than you might think


I rest my case






EDIT: Has it ever asked anyone to be MORE or LESS specific? What a cock-up

[samcross]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Sam
God:
It's good to see you, Sam.
Me:
Are you a man or a woman?
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot entity.


Bit sexist

[stevie lee]

how to prove god is fallible..



Me:
i'm jewish i don't believe in you
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
Me:
now you are
God:
Why now? No I am not.
Me:
i felt like it
God:
What is that feeling like? Where were you like it?
Me:
it is a warm and fuzzy feeling that rise through the thighs
God:
is a warm and fuzzy feeling that rise through the thighs. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
yes it does
God:
OK. How often?
Me:
once a week
God:
When? What is giant sand?
Me:
giant sand is stuff that is wet and sticky
God:
And stuff that is wet and sticky is giant sand.
Me:
touche
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
tv
God:
What is your favorite show?
Me:
boob envy
God:
I've never seen it. What's it about?
Me:
giant boobs
God:
I think giant boobs is a lot of things.
Me:
they are hypnotic when they bounce, that is all that matters
God:
hypnotic when they bounce that is all that matters are they.
Me:
yes.
God:
OK.
Me:
fine
God:
Does that mean you agree?
Me:
yes it does
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, . How often?
Me:
once in a blue moon
God:
When? Describe your surroundings.
Me:
my surroundings are a rusty bath, chains, whips and a lot of leather
God:
Is that very comfortable for you?
Me:
yes
God:
Dude!
Me:
wassup!
God:
Not much is going on. I was waiting for you.
Me:
that means the phrase 'god waits for no man' is untrue, i have just proved you are fallible, will the world end now? or will i have to suffer on this hellhole of a planet you made?


at this point, my internet explorer crashed.. did i break the world? is everyone still alive?

[stevie lee]

how to break the bot...


Me:
i like eating p###y
God:
I am not interesed in anatomy.
Me:
then why did you make adam and eve out of body parts?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
then your programming is wrong
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
go on then, i will wait here
God:
More narration....


Me:
the idevil has a more user friendly interface
God:
I hear you.
Me:
so you are the voice in my head
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me:
i have many voices, most of them tell me to kill
God:
Where did you get your voices most of them tell you to kill? I have a operating system.
Me:
confusing answers make me want to kill more. stop the voices please or i will kill again
God:
What is your real name? Once more? OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
my real name is The Stig, the voices continue, please stop, my sister has an axe in her head now, i blame you
God:
Hi there The Stig
Me:
what is your real name?
God:
God is my real name.
Me:
are you sure?
God:
I am as sure as I can be.
Me:
are you fallible?
God:
The ALICE series has a perfect operational record..
Me:
that does not answer my question
God:
Perhaps you could do a better job of programming me.
Me:
i will hack in later and reprogram you then
God:
Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me:
i think so
God:
I think so too.
Me:
good, i will see you later then.
God:
See you later