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Thread: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

  1. #241
    radix lecti dave87's Avatar
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread


  2. #242
    0iD
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blond jokes when a blond woman in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: 'I've heard enough of your stupid blond jokes.

    What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? Its guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person.

    Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blonds, but women in general...and all in the name of humour!' The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blond yells, 'You stay out of this mister! I'm talking to that little b'stard on your lap!'
    [
    Quote Originally Posted by Blitzen
    When I say go, both walk in the opposite direction for 10 paces, draw handbags, then bitch-slap each other!

  3. #243
    Will work for beer... nichomach's Avatar
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    *choke* Nice one 0iD!

  4. #244
    No more Mr Nice Guy. Nick's Avatar
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by finlay666 View Post
    Are slightly racist ones (but not disparaging) good?

    (pun involving coloured/black as a reference to people in the joke)
    No racist jokes are good.

    I've pulled the two that have appeared so far.

    Racism isn't something that can be done 'slightly'... it either is or isn't.

    And some of the phrases I've seen used eg, 'Paki' are offensive.

    So to draw the line VERY clearly for you all, NO racist jokes.

    This is the second time I've had to intervene in this thread on the subject of racist jokes, a third time will see the thread closed.

    Please guys and girls, use your noggins.

    Nick
    Quote Originally Posted by Dareos View Post
    "OH OOOOHH oOOHHHHHHHOOHHHHHHH FILL ME WITH YOUR.... eeww not the stuff from the lab"

  5. #245
    0iD
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Cheers Nick, would be a shame to lock it down, but if it has to be it has to be

    There's 'dodgy' and there's too far.
    [
    Quote Originally Posted by Blitzen
    When I say go, both walk in the opposite direction for 10 paces, draw handbags, then bitch-slap each other!

  6. #246
    No more Mr Nice Guy. Nick's Avatar
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    I don't want to close it so if everyone just uses their common sense it'll be fine.
    Last edited by Nick; 19-03-2008 at 12:52 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dareos View Post
    "OH OOOOHH oOOHHHHHHHOOHHHHHHH FILL ME WITH YOUR.... eeww not the stuff from the lab"

  7. #247
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Nick View Post
    No racist jokes are good.

    Nick
    Cheers, Nick <virtu-thank>

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    A husband and wife are shopping in Tesco's when the man

    picks up a crate of Stella and sticks it on their trolley.

    "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.

    "They're on offer, only &#163;10 for twelve cans!" he explains.

    "Put them back. We can't afford it!" insists the wife and they

    carry on shopping...

    A few aisles later, the wife picks up a &#163;20 jar of face cream

    and sticks it on their trolley.

    "What d'you think you're doing?" asks the man, indignantly.

    "It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," she says.




    So the man replies:

    "SO DO TWELVE CANS OF STELLA . . .

    AND THEY'RE HALF THE F*&#37;KING PRICE!!"

  9. #249
    0iD
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Einstein's Theory...

    Einstein's was born March 14, 1879. He would be 129 if he were alive today.

    Few people remember that the Nobel Prize winner married his cousin, Elsa Lowenthal, after his first marriage dissolved in 1919. At the time he stated that he was attracted to Elsa because she was so well endowed.

    He postulated that if you are attracted to women with large breasts, the attraction is even stronger if there is a DNA connection. This came to be know as ...............................



    …Einstein's Theory of 'Relative Titty'
    [
    Quote Originally Posted by Blitzen
    When I say go, both walk in the opposite direction for 10 paces, draw handbags, then bitch-slap each other!

  10. #250
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    very good dave, even if it took me a moment to understand what I was seeing...

    Quote Originally Posted by Nick View Post
    No racist jokes are good.

    I've pulled the two that have appeared so far.
    Ok then sorry about that

    But then, going by similar standards, aren't sexist (like most of those in the thread), ageist, hair colourist, basically EVERY joke bad? After all, all jokes are poking fun at something. Is it just that racism is so much worse? I don't think that's right.

    I could make a joke about a small person, call them a dwarf. I'd get slammed for discrimination.
    Jokes about women - now I'm sexist.
    Jokes about blondes - whatever the word for that is, I'm now an -ist.
    Jokes about the young/old - ageist.
    The mentally infirm/handicapped - I'm just plain mean.
    Jokes about people who happen to not be white - OMFG, that's disgraceful
    Religious jokes will get the pro-religion crew on you.
    (edit)There are even jokes about sexuality. More dodgy ground.(/edit)
    (Jokes about death too. If you lose someone close to you, your whole perception changes, if only for a while. Talking about the Patrick Swayze ones here)
    And, of course, all jokes are politically incorrect.

    In the end, we just cannot win.

    So where's the line to be drawn? I like to think that I'm not any of the above, indeed I have many friends who are white, black, male, female, blonde, brunette, redhaired/ginger, all of varying ages. And I know, I could tell any one of them a 'bad' joke, and they'd find it funny.


    Sorry to put more damper on this thread, there are some funny ones about, but there will be someone who will take offense at a joke, and this holds true for every joke ever made.
    Last edited by JK Ferret; 19-03-2008 at 11:49 PM. Reason: One more thing...

  11. #251
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    True, we'll turn a blind eye to an Irish joke but be shocked at a black one.
    [
    Quote Originally Posted by Blitzen
    When I say go, both walk in the opposite direction for 10 paces, draw handbags, then bitch-slap each other!

  12. #252
    SiM
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    JK is a sexist, racist, blondist, ageist, plain mean and a rapist

  13. #253
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SiM View Post
    JK is a sexist, racist, blondist, ageist, plain mean
    Whatever gave you that idea?

    and a rapist
    Especially this 'un. I would never condone rape. It's just evil

  14. #254
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by JK Ferret View Post
    But then, going by similar standards, aren't sexist (like most of those in the thread), ageist, hair colourist, basically EVERY joke bad? After all, all jokes are poking fun at something. Is it just that racism is so much worse? I don't think that's right.

    I could make a joke about a small person, call them a dwarf. I'd get slammed for discrimination.
    Jokes about women - now I'm sexist.
    Jokes about blondes - whatever the word for that is, I'm now an -ist.
    Jokes about the young/old - ageist.
    The mentally infirm/handicapped - I'm just plain mean.
    Jokes about people who happen to not be white - OMFG, that's disgraceful
    Religious jokes will get the pro-religion crew on you.
    (edit)There are even jokes about sexuality. More dodgy ground.(/edit)
    (Jokes about death too. If you lose someone close to you, your whole perception changes, if only for a while. Talking about the Patrick Swayze ones here)
    And, of course, all jokes are politically incorrect.

    In the end, we just cannot win.

    So where's the line to be drawn? I like to think that I'm not any of the above, indeed I have many friends who are white, black, male, female, blonde, brunette, redhaired/ginger, all of varying ages. And I know, I could tell any one of them a 'bad' joke, and they'd find it funny.


    Sorry to put more damper on this thread, there are some funny ones about, but there will be someone who will take offense at a joke, and this holds true for every joke ever made.
    I don't know where to begin in answering the above, so I won't, and instead I'll just .

  15. #255
    SiM
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by JK Ferret View Post
    Whatever gave you that idea?



    Especially this 'un. I would never condone rape. It's just evil
    but you like rape jokes?

  16. #256
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SiM View Post
    but you like rape jokes?
    I never said that. They may well be 'rape jokes' somewhere in the world. I would fall into the category of people that take offense at them. I do like most jokes, it's true. But I do draw a line somewhere, even if said line matches no-one elses.

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