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Thread: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

  1. #1201
    Efficiently lazy shadowmaster's Avatar
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by JK Ferret View Post
    Teh jokes are all over teh interwebs. Ask 0iD, he knows that well
    0iD is my role model

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Whiternoise View Post
    I'd argue the second one wasn't racist or xenophobic in the slightest.

    It's poking fun at us (myself as a born and bred Briton), the English being slowly screwed by the government.
    I'm sure the BNP would give the same answer.

    You may not be hate-filled, but that joke is.

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread



    How many of us would love to do this?

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    Post Not a joke

    Quote Originally Posted by shadowmaster View Post
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Maria had just married, and being a traditional Italian she was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was very nervous. Her mother reassured her: "Don't worry, Maria, Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take care of you. Meanwhile, I'll be making pasta."

    So, up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother and said "Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest."

    "Don't worry, Maria," said her mother, "all good men have hairy chests. Go upstairs. He'll take good care of you."

    So, up she went again. When she got up in the bedroom, Tony took off his trousers exposing his hairy legs. Again, Maria ran downstairs to her mother. "Mama, Mama, Tony took off his trousers and he's got hairy legs!"

    "Don't worry! All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take good care of you."

    So, up she went again. When she got there, Tony took off his socks and on his left foot he was missing three toes. When Maria saw this, she ran downstairs. "Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!"

    Her Mama said, "Stay here and stir the pasta for me."

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    A recent survey done on the Seven Dwarfs found 6 out of 7 of them weren't Happy.

    (Probably a repost, but someone told me this today and I thought it was quite funny. )

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quick Word Game

    Turn "SEAL" into "COAT" in four moves

    SEAL
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _

    COAT

    answer:

    SEAL

    CLUB
    CLUB
    CLUB
    CLUB

    COAT
    Quote Originally Posted by MadduckUK View Post
    now that i think about the word "throttled" in a certain light... its not so far different to strangled really

    our boiler broke so we has no heating or hot water, this is the bloody result ^^

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    SEAL
    1. SEAT
    2. SOAT ~(Snakes on a train)
    3. COAT
    COAT

    H3XU5 Social FAQ
    Quote Originally Posted by tiggerai View Post
    I do like a bit of hot crumpet

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgy291 View Post
    Quick Word Game

    Turn "SEAL" into "COAT" in four moves

    SEAL
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _
    _ _ _ _

    COAT

    answer:

    SEAL

    CLUB
    CLUB
    CLUB
    CLUB

    COAT
    SEAL

    KILL
    SKIN
    CLEAN
    TAILOR

    COAT

    Surely...?




    Or perhaps (actually in four moves):

    SEAL

    SEAT
    MEAT
    MOAT

    COAT

  14. #1210
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    nah lol

    old club club club club sounds better

    oh and btw before anyone desides to call me sick i got it off sikipedia i found it helerious and thought people on hexus might like it

    by no means i suport clubing of seals
    Quote Originally Posted by MadduckUK View Post
    now that i think about the word "throttled" in a certain light... its not so far different to strangled really

    our boiler broke so we has no heating or hot water, this is the bloody result ^^

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgy291 View Post
    by no means i suport clubing of seals
    if you have no means, how do you support it?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    erm i dont?
    Quote Originally Posted by MadduckUK View Post
    now that i think about the word "throttled" in a certain light... its not so far different to strangled really

    our boiler broke so we has no heating or hot water, this is the bloody result ^^

  17. #1213
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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    im getting mixed messages here
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgy291 View Post
    oh and btw before anyone desides to call me sick i got it off sikipedia i found it helerious and thought people on hexus might like it
    That sentence is funnier than the joke.

    You posted it, no one forced you to 'share' it with us.
    H3XU5 Social FAQ
    Quote Originally Posted by tiggerai View Post
    I do like a bit of hot crumpet

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    So, a seal walks into a club...
    I don't mean to sound cold, or cruel, or vicious, but I am so that's the way it comes out.

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    Re: The Well Dodgy Joke Thread

    ...bartender says "what you having?"
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

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