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Thread: "There's a massive spider on you!"

  1. #1
    HEXUS webmaster Steve's Avatar
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    "There's a massive spider on you!"

    That's what my girlfriend said to me as I was popping out for some milk at 8.30 this morning.

    She's really scared of spiders, so I chuckled, thinking it was a money spider.

    Then I looked where she was pointing.

    Chuff me it was huge!

    ...And crawling up the side of my t-shirt!


    It was a standard 'house spider', but a bloomin' big one, probably 2-3 inches diameter and an abdomen about an inch long.

    There's spider blood all over the floor now...
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    DILLIGAF GoNz0's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    clearing out the garage today and saw one of similar size, i nearly told the wife, but decided against the screaming that would follow

  3. #3
    Herr Doktor Oetker, ja!!! pollaxe's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    What is it with Hexites and always killing wildlife!?!?!?! They're not going to hurt you!!

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"



    Poor thing! I mean the spider, I like spiders...

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    Get in the van. Fraz's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Spiders. Goddamn I hate them.

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    HEXUS webmaster Steve's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Quote Originally Posted by pollaxe View Post
    What is it with Hexites and always killing wildlife!?!?!?! They're not going to hurt you!!
    True, and had it been a smaller critter I wouldn't have been so bullish. But when something the size of your palm has been crawling around on you without your knowledge, the reaction can be a little more... violent.
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Here's a good trick for you to try:

    If you are with a mate \ girlfriend who is scared of spiders, go to the fridge, and take the green tops off some nice fresh tomatoes.

    Next take the tops to the front room, bedroom or wherever, and place them strategically around the room, in places that can be noticed during the course of the evening.

    On the arm of a chair, by the side of a pillow, etc. Keep the lights down slightly, and a fun evening should be had by all.

    Tomato tops work really well, but for a better effect, use spiders.

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    Environ'mentalist Zadock's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Fantastic!

    Tegenaria domestica? I used to know all the names of families of spiders that occur in the UK, sadly faded like a lot of the stuff I learnt at university.

    Very useful around the house they are, get rid of all the pests for you. Totally harmless, I have been biten once but you can barely feel it its like a pin prick. Garden spiders on the other hand they can give you a nast nip if they are big enough.

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    haha, now that sounds like a good use for a tomato top if i ever heard one Gave me a good chuckle in work

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Everyone says they are harmless, but this may change your mind...


    RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

  11. #11
    WEEEEEEEEEEEEE! MadduckUK's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"


    yayyyy!
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"


  13. #13
    WEEEEEEEEEEEEE! MadduckUK's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    why did he invite the baddies to the wedding?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephesians
    Do not be drunk with wine, which will ruin you, but be filled with the Spirit
    Vodka

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Because he is AMAZING and wanted to pwn the evil communist baddies as he got married.

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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Plus King Pin was bestest man, he had to be there.

    Althought it is asking for trouble tbh ffs

  16. #16
    hexus.zombeh! format's Avatar
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    Re: "There's a massive spider on you!"

    Quote Originally Posted by Fraz View Post
    Spiders. Goddamn I hate them.
    Ditto matey, hate them.

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