FAO Jaques Chirac

[Galant]

re: Resuming nuke tests in the Pacific

This was a letter to the editor in an Australian newspaper:

An open letter to M. Jacques Chirac:

Mon cher Jack

Je suis a bit fromaged off avec votre decision to blow up La
Pacifique avec le Frog bombes nuclears. Je reckon vous must
have un spot in La Belle France itself pour les explosions.
Le Massive Central? Le Quay d'Orsay? Le Champs Elysees?
Votre own back yard, peut etre?

Frappez le crows avec stones, Sport! La guerre cold est
fini! Votres forces militaire need la bombe atomique about
as beacoup as poisson need les bicyclettes.

Un autre point, cobber. Votre histoire militaire isn't tres
flash, consisting, n'est-ce pas, of battailles the likes of
Crecy, Agincourt, Poitiers, Trafalgar, Borodino, Waterloo,
Sedan et Dien Bien Phu. Un bombe won't change le tradition.
Je/mon pere/mon grand pere/le cousin third avec ma
grandmere/ la plume de ma tante fought avec votre soldats
against Le Boche in WWI (le Big One). Have vous forgotten?

Reconsider, mon ami, otherwise in le hotels et estaminets de
l'Australie le curse anciens d'Angleterre - "Damnation to
the French" - will be heard un autre temps.

Votre chums don't want that.

Millo.




From here

[Galant]

Oh my, and this from the same website:

From New Scientist, 28 august 93, Feedback column:

"The National Westminster Bank admitted last month that it keeps
personal information about its customers-such as their political
affiliation-on computer. But now Computer Weekly reveals that a
financial institution, sadly unnamed, has gone one better and moved
into the realm of personal abuse.
The institution decided to mailshot 2000 of its richest customers,
inviting them to buy extra services. One of its computer programmers
wrote a program to search through its databases and select its
customers automatically. He tested the program with an imaginary
customer called Rich Bastard.
Unfortunately, an error resulted in all 2000 letters being addressed
"Dear Rich Bastard". The luckless programmer was subsequently sacked."


Probably not true, but funny none-the-less!

[Tumble]

V. good

[Blub2k]

Ai j'etais splitting mon cotes!

[spazman]

That is classic