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Thread: A joke about men & women

  1. #1
    Ex-MSFT Paul Adams's Avatar
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    Talking A joke about men & women

    One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

    I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"

    So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear...

    "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.

    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her we went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

    I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, that's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled "WHAT???!!!"

    I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
    ~ I have CDO. It's like OCD except the letters are in alphabetical order, as they should be. ~
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  2. #2
    Ex-PC enthusiast
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    this could have been called the worm that turned
    The Cow by Ogden Nash
    The cow is of the bovine ilk;
    One end is moo, the other, milk.

  3. #3
    One skin, two skin......
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    Rofl!

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