A joke of extremely high quality.

[Zak33]

Bill Gates meets Hugh Grant at a party, and Bill asks him "what WAS Divine Brown really like?"

Hugh winks and says "just like her name.....Divine. Want her number?"

Off goes Bill, well pleased, phone number stored in his mobile. He rings her, makes a date, they go out, he spends a small fortune on her, and on the way home he asks if he can have what Hugh had, that fateful night.

After 15 minutes Divine gives up and says "you know my name is my business? I'm Divine well now I know why you're called MICRO SOFT "

boom boom...

no one delete that....or I'll beat em up

[streetster]

*sigh* my favourite so far is still the lighthouse one

[LWA]

Try this one....

Two snowmen in a field, one turns to the other and says... (wait for it)

"Can you smell carrot?"

[megah0]

There was two prawns, one called Christian and the other called Paul.
One day they were out swimming and Paul said he was bored of being a
prawn and he wanted to be a shark.
Suddenly a cod popped out of no where and said "I am your fairy Cod
mother, I shall grant you 3 wishes"
Paul said "I want to be a shark".

POOF

Paul was a shark and swimming around but one thing about being a shark
is that everyone is scared of you.
so one day he SHOUTED "Fairy Cod Mother"
then out of no where she came "what do you want".
"I want to be a prawn again" said Paul.
Paul went to his friends Christian's house and said "let me in
Christian"
"No your a shark, you'll eat me"
"No no I'm a Prawn again Christian"

[ajbrun]

A man walks into a pub one night with an octopus, with the absurd claim that it can play any muscial instrument. The man starts the betting at £50 when the barkeeper challenges him to play the piano in the corner. The octopus does, and plays brilliantly. Another person in the pub give the octopus a guitar, but the octopus plays that equally well. This goes on for some time, with people bringing xylophones, trumpets, drums, violins, harps, flutes and dozens of others.

Eventually, one of the Scots produces a set of bagpipes. The octopus eagerly approaches them, but there is no noise for several minutes. The barkeeper says "Aha, you've lost the bet! Your octopus can't play the bagpipes!"

The octopus replies "Play it? I though I was supposed to make love to it!"



And so continues Mike's streak of terrible jokes!

Do you have a habbit of repeating jokes!?!?!?!?!



A few weeks ago, I found a familiar joke on this very fourm. The original is here along with another familiar joke (from this very thread infact!).

I'm sure I've seen the above joke somewhere too, but I can't find it on the forums, so I'll let you off on that one!

EDIT - Nevermind - that one belonged to Shiato Storm - you nicked it from him which it worse!
http://forums.hexus.net/showthread.p...light=bagpipes

PS - please don't be embarrassed/insulted etc. I sort of found it amusing since it's been done before. I mean no offence at all, so don't take it in a bad way .

[Ferral]

Why wern't there any worms on Noah's ark ?

Because worms come in apples not pairs !

[LWA]

Why wern't there any worms on Noah's ark ?

Because worms come in apples not pairs !

You got spare crackers left over from Christmas Ferral?

[KBeee]

2 Nuns in a bath..
Nun # 1 "Where's the soap?"
Nun # 2 "It does doesn't it..."

[shiato storm]

2 Nuns in a bath..
Nun # 1 "Where's the soap?"
Nun # 2 "It does doesn't it..."

I think the joke goes:
nun 1: "where's the soap"
nun 2: "yes!"

might take you a while to get it though

[Spud1]

shiato storm KBeee had it right the first time :0 but it doesnt quite class as a joke, cos it really isnt funny ;p

[shiato storm]

well, you have to think about mine a bit to get it...most people seem lost on it.

[daniel_owen_uk]

Glad I am in the majority then.

[shiato storm]

shall i explain?

ok, i'll try and put this as tactfully as possible - given anyone from kids to 90 yr olds come here...

Think stereotypical situatuion involving nuns...or the lack of men in their lives perhaps? so what might one of these nuns be doing we wonder...? and why say 'yes' all of a sudden?
(think of 'when harry met sally'...)

got it yet? doesn't take a brain surgen

[EvilMunky]

no thats just rubbish!

the first one was the best way of saying it

[LWA]

Agreed ^^