Arise, Sir Santa

[santa claus]

Well, why not? Now let me see what is needed to qualify for an honour:

Made achievements in public life - check. I mean everyone knows Santa's achievements;

Committed themselves to serving and helping Britain - check. And I don't just limit myself to Britain;

They’ll usually have made life better for other people or be outstanding at what they do - check, ask your kids if they're life is better with or without Santa;

Making a difference to their community or field of work - check. No-one else does what I do with such impact year in year out;

Enhancing Britain’s reputation - check - see above, it's not just Britain either;

Long-term voluntary service - check. Been doing this since you, your mum, your mum's mum etc were kids and I don't get paid;

Innovation and entrepreneurship - check. For my spawning of a whole industry of decorations, puddings, meals etc.

Changing things, with an emphasis on achievement - cheque

Improving life for people less able to help themselves - cheque

Displaying moral courage and doing difficult things - hey, just where is my cheque?

So Santa Claus qualifies on all counts for an award. It would be elitist not to give me one. I'm not just in it for the money you know.

I suppose my moan is that awards are given out like sweets these days. Mickey Mouse wants one too .

[CAT-THE-FIFTH]

The Moose wants one too.

Arise,Sir Moose.....crash!bang!wallop! Oops! You OK your majesty??

[kalniel]

But you only work one day a year, so could you imagine the DM backlash? Slacker.

[santa claus]

But you only work one day a year, so could you imagine the DM backlash? Slacker.

I may work one day, but it's a lifetime of preparation. Y'know like sporty people.

[kalniel]

I may work one day, but it's a lifetime of preparation. Y'know like sporty people.

Mince pies and sherry aren't quite the same gruelling training regime..

[ConnorLowe]

There should be a petition sent to the Queen! With a live TV broadcast of the occasion!

[santa claus]

Mince pies and sherry aren't quite the same gruelling training regime..

That 'gruelling training regime' is a matter of ego and personal gain. Britain doesn't come into it.

People who work every day should get awards before most of those who actually do imo.

There should be a petition sent to the Queen! With a live TV broadcast of the occasion!

I promise to wear the red suit with no dinner stains down the front for Her Maj.

[Saracen]

....

People who work every day should get awards before most of those who actually do imo.

....

Well, that's never going to happen. What would all those ex-politicians do? They wouldn't qualify for honours. The Lords would be virtually empty.

Hmmm. Let's do it.

[jim]

I've just skimmed over your list, Santa, but I didn't see any mention of making large contributions to a political party?

On that basis, you're hardly very deserving.

[kalniel]

I've just skimmed over your list, Santa, but I didn't see any mention of making large contributions to a political party?

Well he's wearing labour party colours...

[peterb]

Well he's wearing labour party colours...

I thought they were Christmas Party colours?

[Kai]

I thought they were Christmas Party colours?

In that case their definitely Labour's colours , who else will be celebrating this Xmas ?

Other than the royals , obama and the rest of high society ..

[jim]

I thought they were Christmas Party colours?

Ouch.

[santa claus]

I thought they were Christmas Party colours?

Vote Christmas Party! All future elections will be held on Dec 25 when everyone is piddled. I'll be in office forever

[Zak33]

you cant be a Sir....

cos you're already a Saint (Nick)

so... stop being greedy and get back to shovelling reindeer poop

[santa claus]

you cant be a Sir....

cos you're already a Saint (Nick)

so... stop being greedy and get back to shovelling reindeer poop

Aww, not fair. I'll have to stick with my current citations then:

Saint Santa of Hexus CIA KGB SS (Poop Shoveller)