Double glazing cold callers; this evening's moderately interesting example

[wasabi]

*raises hand...*

It could be Martians in disguise, looking for new bodies to take over and inhabit...
Better make sure your tinfoil hat is in order, so they can't control your brain...!!

Or an armed robber, if it is the US of A. Justifiable homicide laws and the escalation problem with widespread firearm ownership.

[opel80uk]

In fact, I'm looking forward to my next visitor which hasn't been for a while now. My aim is to be chatting to a double-glazing salesman when a broadband adviser turns up so that we can all have a big pow-wow in the street.

I would pay good money to see that!

What I used to do when living in London is respond to a question with a non-coherent answer (no jokes please!), all the while keeping a straight face:

Cold caller: ‘Hello Sir, have you thought about replacing your windows and would you be interested in having a look at our glazing catalogue?

Me: ‘Yes, I have. But what we need to consider is that frequently compounding tasks with relationships, make the pertinent point of development by a number of issues’

Cold caller: ‘I’m sorry?’

Me: (change wording, but do the same)


I would then see how many times they would ask me to repeat myself before they left. Good times, and when I think about that it makes me miss London!

[peterb]

Or an armed robber, if it is the US of A. Justifiable homicide laws and the escalation problem with widespread firearm ownership.

Indeed. It must be dreadful living in a country where the forces of law and order are so weak that you dare not answer the door without being armed - and I thought that only applied to so called third world countries.

Presumably the corollary is that you do not knock on anyones door without being armed - just in case.

[wasabi]

Presumably the corollary is that you do not knock on anyones door without being armed - just in case.

Or fear the consequences if they don't.

[Ttaskmaster]

Or an armed robber, if it is the US of A. Justifiable homicide laws and the escalation problem with widespread firearm ownership.

Far less of a concern in deepest darkest Crinkley-Bottom though, where even the crow-scarer is just the Vicar before his morning cup of coffee... !

[TeePee]

Indeed. It must be dreadful living in a country where the forces of law and order are so weak that you dare not answer the door without being armed - and I thought that only applied to so called third world countries.

Presumably the corollary is that you do not knock on anyones door without being armed - just in case.

Better to live in a country where you don't dare to answer the door at all, like the majority of posters in this thread?

Basic common sense precautions are all it takes. You wouldn't want to miss out on Girl Scout Cookies out of fear would you?

And I don't knock on anyone's door without being invited.

[peterb]

I think you'll find the majority of posters here in the UK answer their door without a moments thought or fear - in the same way they wouldn't think twice about popping round to a neighbours, with or without an invitation.

[Domestic_Ginger]

Girl scout cookie armed to the teeth!

I'm terrified of opening the door; it could be my neighbour reminding me to put my bins out or heaven forbid some charity collecter......

[Saracen]

I think you'll find the majority of posters here in the UK answer their door without a moments thought or fear - in the same way they wouldn't think twice about popping round to a neighbours, with or without an invitation.

And occasionally, though thankfully it's rare, that lack of care can bite.

Remember the elderly gent (retired Colonel) that did that, only to get blasted by a shotgun? Maybe, 5 years ago?

Or, several families that have suffered home invasions?

Or elderly people that end up beaten, robbed and in at least one case I remember, raped?

I have my elderly mother-in-law trained (and she's sharp as a razor so it didn't take much) to ALWAYS check who's there through the window, and ALWAYS leave the (fairly heavy and well-secured) door limiter in place if she does open it, and to be honest, if she doesn't know you or isn't expecting you, she just won't open it.

Even delivery drivers are instructed to ring her before arrival, ir they aren't getting in. Thankfully, she doesn't do that much, and usually uses John Lewis, who are quite happy to do that, and (so far, at least) their drivers have always bern happy to oblige.

We're currently considering a door intercom, and/or CCTV for her.

And frankly, I'd though about it myself.

[TeePee]

It's probably Jehovah's Witnesses.

I think we can all agree there's much to be afraid of there...

[Saracen]

It's probably Jehovah's Witnesses.

I think we can all agree there's much to be afraid of there...

Well, there are times when a shotgun might come in useful.


Okay, okay, I'm just kidding.

Kinda.

[Ttaskmaster]

That said, very few of the occasions where people's homes have been breached upon answering the door have involved *armed invaders, which probably says more about how polite the UK is - One has no need of a weapon... one has merely to ask nicely!

"Yes, may I help you?"
"Yeh. Gimme yer TV and yer stereo!"
"I'm sorry, have we been introduced?"
"Err... Nah, sorry, I don't fink so"
"Ah. Well then I'm afraid I shall be unable to assist you on this occasion"
"Oh... well, no bovver then. I'll jus' be on ma way..."
"Have you far to go?"
"Nah, jus' dahn the road an' on a bit, really"
"Would you care for some tea before you depart?"
"Oh. That'd be jolly nice o' ya!"
"Well you'd best come in then, I think"
"Fanks very much!"

[csgohan4]

The weird thing about phone cold calls is I have never given out my landline number to anyone. Even requested number to be off the directory when I first got the line too.

I just unplug the cable as all calls are cold callers. Even got the standard your bank account is compromised call who would not hang up and you dial your bank scheme.

Lolz I just said wait let me check my online banking, guy just hung up.

[sammyc]

I think you'll find the majority of posters here in the UK answer their door without a moments thought or fear - in the same way they wouldn't think twice about popping round to a neighbours, with or without an invitation.

Better to live in a country where you don't dare to answer the door at all, like the majority of posters in this thread?

As others have posted, I'm not afraid to answer the door, I just don't want to. Especially I don't want to be interrupted in order to go to the door for an encounter which can at best (assuming its any form of salesperson, canvasser &c) result in no sale for them and the relative unpleasantness of saying 'no' for me. So a waste of all our time.

As far as neighbours popping round without an invitation goes, however - not unless my or their house is on fire, and tbh, even that's borderline.

But that's the thing .... the best way to do something you shouldn't is to look like you belong. It WAY reduces the odds of neighbours being suspicious, and gives you a cover story if challenged, be it by homeowners, or police.

I take your point, bogus window cleaners need to clank about and make a good show of looking openly like window cleaners, & so forth. This chap had time to do the type of thing you mention, overtly looking the place up & down &c, but instead he was just standing on the doorstep talking & occasionally dingling the doorbell or knocking. (Apart from the quick look-at-house-from-street, which I assume was to check for upstairs movement.) I doubt you could recce that much looking at a front door? but I may be wrong & he was talking while taking in useful data..

I'm undecided about a no cold callers sign, as whenever I see one in a window my first thought tends to be 'nervous and/or doddery pensioner', and if I think that, so might others - so its own way that also gives out an unwanted impression.

[sammyc]

None of this helps you though sammy as clearly the blokes that called to see you are hitmen.

Well I hope they enjoy the two pound ten it's worth to anyone to have me 'taken out'.

[Saracen]

...., but instead he was just standing on the doorstep talking & occasionally dingling the doorbell or knocking. (Apart from the quick look-at-house-from-street, which I assume was to check for upstairs movement.) I doubt you could recce that much looking at a front door? but I may be wrong & he was talking while taking in useful data..

....

From your description, it doesn't look like he was casing you, to me either. But if he was, what he'd do might depend on what he finds. If, for instance, he spotted a door or window he knows is weak and he can get through, why act suspiciously by sneaking all round the house, when he's got what he needs, which is a way in. But as I said, it doesn't sound like he was casing you. Probably.

....

I'm undecided about a no cold callers sign, as whenever I see one in a window my first thought tends to be 'nervous and/or doddery pensioner', and if I think that, so might others - so its own way that also gives out an unwanted impression.

"Beware of the Dogs .... trespassers will be eaten."

????