Why some people won't put Alexa in the room

[Saracen]

....

You don't think all the cameras would record this and void your warranty?
And by Void Your Warranty, I mean the Sandmen coming round to 'renew' you... !!

Me? I dun nuffink, Gov.

I just have a hint of prescience, foresight. It's a genetic throwback to my far Romany Gypsy ancestry. And I'm sure our government wouldn't unfairly persecute a minority.

Besides .... wait, I'm getting another vision .... I think, wait, it's not .... it's clearing now .... I think the cameras would have suffered the same sort of accident. First.

[Ttaskmaster]

It's a genetic throwback to my far Romany Gypsy ancestry. And I'm sure our government wouldn't unfairly persecute a minority.

And let's just have a look at what ethnicity you ticked on your last census, shall we?

Besides .... wait, I'm getting another vision .... I think, wait, it's not .... it's clearing now .... I think the cameras would have suffered the same sort of accident. First.

What, the cameras on the Alexa device, you mean?
The ones that upload real-time footage of you "accidenting" your poor AI assistant, that some actual current generation minority laboured for hours to lovingly craft?
You absolute beast, you..... GEDDINTHABACKOFTHAVAN!!!!!

[Saracen]

And let's just have a look at what ethnicity you ticked on your last census, shall we?

Well, I, being a good, honest, compliant little cog, answered the census accurately (*). However, as I said, the sight is from a genetic throwback to my Romany ancestry. Some genes, you see, skip a generation and re-appear dominant down the line. I have to say I missed the bit on the census form where it said we have to have a full genetic assay done, and besides, I doubt the box on the form was big enough to get my full ancestral description in.

What, the cameras on the Alexa device, you mean?
The ones that upload real-time footage of you "accidenting" your poor AI assistant, that some actual current generation minority laboured for hours to lovingly craft?
You absolute beast, you..... GEDDINTHABACKOFTHAVAN!!!!!

What cameras? The ones you referred to, of course, in Alexa or otherwise. My foresight sees them recording real-time footage of some dark-clad bloke in a helmet looking something like a cross between a ninja and a jet black Imperial stormtrooper. Or was it dungarees and a bike helmet? Dunno, I need to get my foresight upgraded to HD, or 4K. It's currently stuck in analog, and looks rather like an old and worn-out videotape.

Besides, I'm not stupid enough to "accident" (nice verb, by the way, I like that) my own damn cameras. Forensic analysis, pre-accident) from the cameras would probably show some person of a completely different height, build and shoe size to me, breaking in to nick my state-installed Alexa's.

Of course, in reality, none of this would happen. I'd have emigrated long before it gets that bad.


(*) I even answered the religion question accurately. On the last one, it was blank. On the one before, I was Jedi .... though I admit my conversion had been, ummm, recent (5 minutes before filling in form) and didn't last long (5 minutes after finishing the form). I was, however, sincere while it lasted, and utterly true to the message I was sending the census which, of course, was "None of your 'flipping' business, you nosy 《bleeeeps》.

[Ttaskmaster]

Well, I, being a good, honest, compliant little cog, answered the census accurately (*). However, as I said, the sight is from a genetic throwback to my Romany ancestry.

So not a minority then, sir. Thank-you, that was all I needed to hear...
Take 'im away, Lads!!

Some genes, you see, skip a generation and re-appear dominant down the line.

And you have brought complete evidence of these genes to this trial, have you not?
You can supply indisputable evidence of this genetic dominance in a comprehensive behavioural analysis, can you not?
What do you mean, "No"?
Mi'Lord, I move for sentencing......

My foresight sees them recording real-time footage of some dark-clad bloke in a helmet looking something like a cross between a ninja and a jet black Imperial stormtrooper. Or was it dungarees and a bike helmet? Dunno, I need to get my foresight upgraded to HD, or 4K. It's currently stuck in analog, and looks rather like an old and worn-out videotape.

You... you mean to say.... that is, you openly admit that you have not installed all compulsory upgrades.... and that you are therefore in open rebellion against the establishment...... you openly admit this???!!!!!
GUARDS!! GUARDS!!! SEIZE HIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!

Besides, I'm not stupid enough to "accident" (nice verb, by the way, I like that) my own damn cameras.

By all the seven CEOs of Heaven, man.....!!!!!
Is open rebellion not enough for you?
Now you're actually flaunting and boasting of the deliberate negligence in your failure to secure and protect against other parties the state-owned property that was personally entrusted to you......?

I have no choice but to sentence you to a dystopian punishment that would make Huxley, Orwell and Kafka wet their pants...... Unfortunately I cannot even tell you what this is, as Forum Decorum prohibits such words.
Now, before you are taken from this place to your place of punishment... Neil Blomkamp automatically has the rights to portray your punishment as a small scene in his next film. However, your last and final right is that you may suggest who might portray you - Do you have any nominations?

Of course, in reality, none of this would happen. I'd have emigrated long before it gets that bad.

To where?
By the time you could afford to move, the United American Federal Empire would own everywhere.

[ik9000]

you know it's funny but I've noticed a change in how alexa behaves recently. I swear it's had a chip on its shoulder for the last few weeks since I told it that it was a useless piece of crap (because it keeps dropping connection and doing things we haven't asked it to do). Been fine with the wife, but moody as heck with me. Could well be linked to this new approach. And it's at this point I ditch it. I'm not having any piece of tech start trying to force me to act in ways it - or rather its coders - deem to be the correct way to act. That's absurd. Currently unplugged, and tomorrow it gets the hammer. Or at least a coffin in the attic. It's not like it even works properly half the time as it is. They'd do better spending their time getting it work properly, rather than trying to become the mind police. though if the moody sulk is anything to go by, they're not bad at the coding lark. Pretty jolly realistic that - especially when it's a gross distortion of a (not-unmerited) throw-away comment!

[peterb]

Alexa has been remodelled heavily recently.

http://www.rediff.com/getahead/repor...w/20180119.htm
https://work.qz.com/1180607/amazons-...at-upsets-you/

not long ago "she'd" reply positively to being told she was "hot" .. and now "she" rebuffs negative agressive speech.

It's AI... it shouldn't do either.

I disagree with it being a female voice tbh

Well I've just tried "Alexa you're hot" (obviously because the heat sinking on the device is poor ) and got the replies:

1. Thats a nice thing to say
2. Thats really sweet

But nothing about the current at 5 volts leading to xx watts of power consumption. Obviously not technical.

[peterb]

Alexa has been remodelled heavily recently.

http://www.rediff.com/getahead/repor...w/20180119.htm
https://work.qz.com/1180607/amazons-...at-upsets-you/

not long ago "she'd" reply positively to being told she was "hot" .. and now "she" rebuffs negative agressive speech.

It's AI... it shouldn't do either.

I disagree with it being a female voice tbh

Well I've just tried "Alexa you're hot" (obviously because the heat sinking on the device is poor ) and got the replies:

1. Thats a nice thing to say
2. Thats really sweet

But nothing about the current at 5 volts leading to xx watts of power consumption. Obviously not technical.

[CAT-THE-FIFTH]

you know it's funny but I've noticed a change in how alexa behaves recently. I swear it's had a chip on its shoulder for the last few weeks since I told it that it was a useless piece of crap (because it keeps dropping connection and doing things we haven't asked it to do). Been fine with the wife, but moody as heck with me. Could well be linked to this new approach. And it's at this point I ditch it. I'm not having any piece of tech start trying to force me to act in ways it - or rather its coders - deem to be the correct way to act. That's absurd. Currently unplugged, and tomorrow it gets the hammer. Or at least a coffin in the attic. It's not like it even works properly half the time as it is. They'd do better spending their time getting it work properly, rather than trying to become the mind police. though if the moody sulk is anything to go by, they're not bad at the coding lark. Pretty jolly realistic that - especially when it's a gross distortion of a (not-unmerited) throw-away comment!

This is just a joke,right??

[Saracen]

So not a minority then, sir. Thank-you, that was all I needed to hear...
Take 'im away, Lads!!


And you have brought complete evidence of these genes to this trial, have you not?
You can supply indisputable evidence of this genetic dominance in a comprehensive behavioural analysis, can you not?
What do you mean, "No"?
Mi'Lord, I move for sentencing......


You... you mean to say.... that is, you openly admit that you have not installed all compulsory upgrades.... and that you are therefore in open rebellion against the establishment...... you openly admit this???!!!!!
GUARDS!! GUARDS!!! SEIZE HIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!



By all the seven CEOs of Heaven, man.....!!!!!
Is open rebellion not enough for you?
Now you're actually flaunting and boasting of the deliberate negligence in your failure to secure and protect against other parties the state-owned property that was personally entrusted to you......?

I have no choice but to sentence you to a dystopian punishment that would make Huxley, Orwell and Kafka wet their pants...... Unfortunately I cannot even tell you what this is, as Forum Decorum prohibits such words.
Now, before you are taken from this place to your place of punishment... Neil Blomkamp automatically has the rights to portray your punishment as a small scene in his next film. However, your last and final right is that you may suggest who might portray you - Do you have any nominations?



To where?
By the time you could afford to move, the United American Federal Empire would own everywhere.

Well, I can documrnt my ancestry on one side for about 400 years, and on the other, parts of it nearly 800 years, though it has to be said that the further back you go, the trickier (or even impossible) it gets, due to the age snd i increasingly vague snd uncertain nature of docunents. Ever tried researching 500 year old (or more) Parish records. Also, there are inferences of, ahem, an irregularity or two thst are impossible to confirm. So while I'm as confident as I can be of what I've got, I'm sure there are gaps.

Oh, and I can afford to go right now.

I have no choice but to sentence you to a dystopian punishment that would make Huxley, Orwell and Kafka wet their pants......

No, you mean ..... not ..... PLEASE NOOOOO ..... a Jeremy Corbyn governed UK?

Surely that kind of sentence is banned under international human rights law .... "cruel and unusual" punishment. Or torture.

[MLyons]

Of course, in reality, none of this would happen. I'd have emigrated long before it gets that bad.

Personally planning on Lichtenstein

No, you mean ..... not ..... PLEASE NOOOOO ..... a Jeremy Corbyn governed UK?

Surely that kind of sentence is banned under international human rights law .... "cruel and unusual" punishment. Or torture.

No. Theresa "crypto" May and Nigel "Career politician" Farage reanimated with a sprinkling of David "pig enthusiast" Cameron.

[Saracen]

....

No. Theresa "crypto" May and Nigel "Career politician" Farage reanimated with a sprinkling of David "pig enthusiast" Cameron.

Different section of the same circle of hell.

Yours is reserved for you. Mine for me. And mine remains Corbyn.

[CAT-THE-FIFTH]

Personally planning on Lichtenstein



No. Theresa "crypto" May and Nigel "Career politician" Farage reanimated with a sprinkling of David "pig enthusiast" Cameron.

Add Boris to that - who apparently flip-flops on major political views dependent on what post in government he is in and he and Gove stabbed his own friend Cameron in the back since they saw a chance of being party leader,and good old Gove who is utterly clueless in any position he is in.

Having said that,the last 25 years of UK governments have alrady pushed us into a dystopian world for too many people.

The bunch of moronic idiots,managed to drag us into a war with islamic fundamentalists by their weird obsession of going into the can of worms,known as the Middle East,which we knew historically was a bad idea. Iraq and Afghanistan is bad enough,but after that nasty business,we then decided to get involved in Libya and Syria,which has caused even worse problems for countries like Italy.

UK politicans.....UK politicans never changes.

[Saracen]

Back to Alexa ... personally, I'm not putting anything with permanently live mics or, worse yet, cameras and an always-on data connection in my living areas, now or EVER, because to do so would require that when these comoanies say they don't 'listen', 'watch', or track, record and analyse, I simply don't trust them. And, I've yet to see anything these devices do that I need, or even want badly enough. In fact, I can't see anything I really want at all, let alone even want "badly enough".

I mean, talking to a little box and asking it things? Well, maybe "lights at medium", but to even risk audio or video datastreams for that? No way.

Of course, if you, dear reader, either do trust these companies, or don't care, or really want what these boxes do then great, have at it. But not me.

[Zak33]

Different section of the same circle of hell.

Yours is reserved for you. Mine for me. And mine remains Corbyn.

class

[Saracen]

Seeing as this thread has gone totally off course as a result of a flippant remark I made as part of some jovial banter between Ttaskmaster abd myself about Alexa, and has now morphed into a serious and deep political thread, I'm closing this now.

When it's re-opened, I expect it to revert to Alexa, and from now on, be both a Corbyn abx Farage free zone.

Gawd, how to moodkill some light-hearted banter.

[peterb]

I have cleaned up the grossly off topic posts and created a new thread. https://forums.hexus.net/general-dis...rage-rant.html

This thread re-opened for on-topic posts (ie, those about Alexa!)