Boris Jonson - absolute nubber

[Zak33]

https://uk.reuters.com/article/uk-br...-idUKKBN1O514V

how can anyone, under that level of spotlight ( and its deliberate spotlight.. he seeks it all of the time)... fail to declare over £50,000 of income on time? Did he forget?

In her report, the commissioner, Kathryn Stone, concluded that Johnson was in breach of the rules of the House of Commons, parliament’s lower chamber, for a failure to fulfil his responsibilities, saying it was neither “inadvertent” nor “minor”.

He writes a weekly column for the Daily Telegraph and earns £275,000 for that....but seems to have failed to budget these incomes in the alloted time.

Nubber... prime nubber.

how on EARTH does he expect any normal income household to believe a single solitary word from him?

[Lanky123]

I think his punishment probably indicates how/why he didn't bother to declare it. Failure to declare a casual £50k = an apology. I imagine HMRC would take an equally lenient attitude if any of us were to apply a similar rounding error to a tax return...

[Ttaskmaster]

OH......... MY........ GAWD............

Have we returned to medieval times? Have Nazis taken over the British penal system? What kind of barbaric people would do this to Boris??!!!
Sure he made some mistakes and technically did something a mite dodgy, but is there any need to publicly brutalise the man??!!
Jeez, is this is the sort of punishment we dole out to people now? It'd have been kinder to just find a couple of hard pite-hitting back benchers to go to work on the B-Jo with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch...!!

Is he OK? Does he need much counselling? Have victim support been notified? You know, I feel the PTSD about to hit me just from reading about the poor man's ordeal. How he is still standing after enduring such a fate is an absolute miracle..... I should probably vote for him on the next electy-thing day.

[Zak33]

OH......... MY........ GAWD............

Have we returned to medieval times? Have Nazis taken over the British penal system? What kind of barbaric people would do this to Boris??!!!
Sure he made some mistakes and technically did something a mite dodgy, but is there any need to publicly brutalise the man??!!
Jeez, is this is the sort of punishment we dole out to people now? It'd have been kinder to just find a couple of hard pite-hitting back benchers to go to work on the B-Jo with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch...!!

Is he OK? Does he need much counselling? Have victim support been notified? You know, I feel the PTSD about to hit me just from reading about the poor man's ordeal. How he is still standing after enduring such a fate is an absolute miracle..... I should probably vote for him on the next electy-thing day.

you're right.. I'm sorry... I was a tad harsh....

I wil assign you as his counselor (and I don't even know how to spell counsellor) and we can all go see him Christmas day and make sure he's ok, poor little floppy-haired darling.

[ik9000]

anyone needing secret santa ideas?

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Wheres-Bori.../dp/1409153533

[Ttaskmaster]

you're right.. I'm sorry... I was a tad harsh....

Why, what did you do to him?
I was talking about being ordered to apologise!

I wil assign you as his counselor (and I don't even know how to spell counsellor)

It's spelled 'councillor'... and, being his one, I believe it therefore entitles me to a percentage... Thanks very much!!

[Jonj1611]

It's spelled 'councillor'... and, being his one, I believe it therefore entitles me to a percentage... Thanks very much!!

Actually its counsellor

[ik9000]

You sure it's not clownseller?

[Jonj1611]

You sure it's not clownseller?

Could well be

[Ttaskmaster]

Actually its counsellor

Are you absolutely certain?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Councillor

You sure it's not clownseller?

Why, are you in the market for some? For the right price, I'm sure we can find whatever suits your needs best!

[Jonj1611]

I think Zak was referring to a counsellor - someone who is trained to listen to people and give them advice about their problems.

Think your talking about a councillor which is an elected member of a local government

[Ttaskmaster]

I think Zak was referring to a counsellor - someone who is trained to listen to people and give them advice about their problems.
Think your talking about a councillor which is an elected member of a local government

Yes indeed. Same word, different spellings.
It's almost as if the joke were written for me...... don't you think?

[spacein_vader]

Yes indeed. Same word, different spellings.
It's almost as if the joke were written for me...... don't you think?

Both cost a lot more than they're worth.

[ik9000]

You sure it's not clownseller?

Why, are you in the market for some? For the right price, I'm sure we can find whatever suits your needs best!

Type "Boris Johnson Clown" into google. These are just a few of the hits:








So no, I'm not in the market for that particular line of clown. Certainly not one who misled the public about serious matters such as whether or not to vote leave with statements that later turned out to be less than substantiable.

[Saracen999]

Yes indeed. Same word, different spellings.
It's almost as if the joke were written for me...... don't you think?

Or more accurately, different word but same phonetics.

Classic case, the word "read".

When you read this, did you "hear" read (pronounced as reed, like the grassy thing) or red (pronounced as per the colour of a UK letterbox)? The difference, of course, is the tense,

But "Have you read Tom Clancy's latest book" is spelt very differently, but pronounced the same way as "What's the main colour of China's flag?" Two different words, that sound the same but mean different things.

Whereas, "Are you going read Tom Clancy's latest book?" and "Have you read Tom Clancy's latest book" are spelt the same but sound different, and mean different things. But you coukd confuse, phonetically, "read" as in present tense of reading a book, witb "reed" as in the plant typically found by a river bank.

Or, "mean" as in a generic class of statistical calcukations, "mean" as in being nasty to someone, or "mean" as being a bit if a Scrooge.

And if you haven't got a headache yet, English is a slippery enough language that it is possible to use the same single word, five times in succession in a single grammatically correct (if unusual) sentence. To be clear, I mean, the same word 5 times without any other word in-between any of them.

I'll leave it as an exercuse for those with too much time on their hands to work out whuch word, or words, I might be referring to, and in what context.

But in case you don't have a headache yet, what about to, too and two?


PS. Sorry.

[Ttaskmaster]

Or more accurately, different word but same phonetics.

Only if you assume I was using the noun form and ignoring the verb... Which I'm sure is a Masked Man fallacy, several fallacies of presumption, a couple of argumentative ones and at least one conditional, but since it's Christmas and those are precisely what allows the joke to work in the first place, I suppose I could let it slide just this once... but it's never funny if you have to explain it!!

PS. Sorry.

Apology accepted, Captain Needa...