I should be in bed but I am struggling to sleep because I am worrying.
My anxiety is connected to the virus and my business but it's not exactly my problem. Sorry it's long but I just need to type it. You don't have to read it.
Today I had two call outs to vulnerable people shielded for health reasons. Being locked down and not allowed outside their internet connections are essential for shopping and keeping in touch with family and health services.
My first visit was to install a router for a couple in their 80s, the husband has just had open heart surgery. Gloved up, overall on. Should take 30 minutes to an hour tops.
Where they want the router is on an extension so I do a quiet line test and there is feedback and a horrendous crackle. Not a chance of the modem syncing. I help track down the master socket, make sure there is no home care or alarm monitoring. Remove the faceplate, repeat the quiet line test and it is not the extension causing the crackling. I tell them they need to call BT and usually this is when I strongly recommend the customer lets me leave. Paying an engineer to sit on hold is not good use of anybodies money.
In the circumstances, because the couple are frail and they are looking very worried and urging me to stay, I agree to help with the call to BT. I look up the fault reporting number. They negotiate the security checks, pass the phone over and I explain the situation and what I have done. Can't believe how helpful the operator is immediately accepting the diagnosis. To be fair the crackling is pretty loud. Then Jack tells me he is transferring the call to faults. (What was Jack's role?) I'm on hold 5 mins, Jack comes back and tells me there is a queue.
I wait another 10 minutes before making my apologies and explain I will have to leave. (We are trying to keep the time in people's houses to a minimum.) I write out exactly what I have done, and an instruction to let them know they are vulnerable people (elderly customers are often too proud to say it). Have them read it back and leave the couple still waiting on hold.
The couple called my wife while I was on my afternoon call out, distraught. They were on hold 3 hours when they got through, they were told the router wasn't connected properly. (I left it connected but it won't sync.) BT completely ignored what I had written, including the words "Just listen to the crackling on this line." Refused to send an engineer and terminated the call. That was this mornings call out.
The afternoon call out was to fit a mesh kit for a couple in their 70s in a large property struggling to print over WiFi. I allowed 1 to 2 hours. Another router in an extension, so another quiet line test. No problem this time, you could hear a pin drop. Log into the router, 5.2Mbps down 800Kbps up. ADSL2 speeds. The property is in a village so maybe that's all they got.
The wife mentions they are struggling with Zoom...800Kbps not surprised. I mention the mesh kit won't sort that out. They need 'superfast' vdsl2. The wife is organised and instantly pulls the out the bill. Don't be fooled by Dates of Birth, this lady is running up and down stairs faster than your average 30 year old and could sort my in-tray just by staring at it. The husbands at risk which is why they are shielded but he's not pleased he can't play on his Laser dinghy (try sailing one, they hurt). The couple have been paying sky for 69Mbps down 39Mbps up for the last year.
While I am messing with mesh the wife calls the Sky helpline. The phone is passed to me and, I can only say he had an Eastern European accent, as he refused to provide a name. I read off the sync stats. Yes there is a micro filter and by the way the numbers, the PPPoA encapsulation, doesn't it look a lot like ADSL2. Phone back to the wife
"Can we try the master socket."
(Thinks why? We are an order of magnitude off the right numbers, the line is quiet and synced at exactly ADSL service speed.)
"Sure where is it"
Dutifully we start carting the router round the phone sockets, none of which are a master. The closest I found was an old master on a dead line. Search of the entire house ensues. Check the rooms closest the cable entry from the pole. Nothing. It's big house that has been cut around.
We have been on the phone well over an hour now. I'm hot and bothered and no closer to finishing the job I am there to do. Phone passed to me and I ask what's the problem.
"There is a problem in the property wiring."
"No there isn't, they are on the wrong service."
"There is a cap at the exchange."
"So why have you had us trapesing round the house for an hour."
"What would you like me to do."
"I would like you to organise getting your customer the service she is paying for."
"Would you like a 'shiny new router'"
(He's condescending me now)
"I would like you to transfer me to your supervisor or someone that can help resolve the problem."
"You can end the call and redial."
(This guy knows all the tricks. If we put the phone down it is another 1/2 hour+ to get through)
"OK give me the call log number."
"######"
"Now I am going to advise your customer they are entitled to a refund for every day you have provided less than the speed they are paying for. I am passing you back to your customer and you can decide what you would like to do."
I start putting the router back. Wife finishes the call and tells me they are sending an engineer tomorrow. And the line was switched 2 weeks ago. (Changed his story again then.)
So now I am a little worried he may have set the couple up, getting the line switched to vDSL and leaving them offline until they get a vDSL router. Luckily they have their phones and the grand daughter has a month unlimited and knows what a personal hotspot is. Phew.
If anyone has made it to the end, I appreciate it. I am feeling a little better but still frustrated by the appalling laziness / incompetence at a time when it's dangerous. The ISPs claim it is a small percentage of customers with problems. I go through this at least a couple times a month every month and usually shrug it off.
How the heck do you get it the attention it deserves. This kind of disgusting attitude to vulnerable customers for whom broadband and wifi are foreign languages seems to be systemic in the industry.
Thank you Hexus. I am off to bed now.


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