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Thread: What if microsoft made cars!

  1. #1
    Senior Member oshta's Avatar
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    What if microsoft made cars!

    This is from another (non computer) forum, not sure if its been post on here before (did look, didnt find) - But its far too good for anyone to miss!!



    1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

    2. Every time they painted new lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

    3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue.

    For some reason you would simply accept this.

    4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

    5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought "CarNT," but then you would have to buy more seats.

    6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but it would only run on five percent of the roads.

    7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light..

    8. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.

    9. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the antenna.

    10. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally Road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50 percent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.

    11. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

    12. You'd have to press the "start" button to turn the engine off.


    Daniel
    Last edited by oshta; 15-04-2005 at 11:35 PM.

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    Bigger than Jesus Norky's Avatar
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    "The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying."

    Best tbh

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    Theoretical Element Spud1's Avatar
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    Genius tbh Describes all M$ products in car format, from the obvious windows, to the horrible *cough* programming *cough* languages like VB

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    i must admit number 5 + few beers = me crying with laughter

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    Senior Member oshta's Avatar
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    Also, 7 is very good!!

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    Senior Member Nemeliza's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norky
    "The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying."

    Best tbh
    lol
    agreed.

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    If your 5555... Swafe's Avatar
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    Oldie but a goodie


    Whenever you drove off a cliff and landed in the sea.....you'd get a mega blue screen of death
    Quote Originally Posted by Knoxville
    As I find big muff's to be a bit of an aquired taste
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    iMc
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    Senior Member iMc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swafeman
    Oldie but a goodie


    Whenever you drove off a cliff and landed in the sea.....you'd get a mega blue screen of death
    yeh saying:

    DRIVER_IRQL_NOT_EQUAL_OR_LESS_OR_QUITE_POSSIBLY_DEAD
    03039443873945828430932489093284938490328498234983249
    Please remove any recently installed passengers and restart.
    HEXUS|iMc

  9. #9
    If your 5555... Swafe's Avatar
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    When putting the defragelerator pedal to the metal, the car takes a good 6 hours before any speed increase
    Quote Originally Posted by Knoxville
    As I find big muff's to be a bit of an aquired taste
    AMD Athlon 4400X2 @ 2.565PenisextentionMhz
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    Senior Amoeba iranu's Avatar
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    When your car was invovled in a fatal crash, the windscreen would turn a pleasant shade of blue, thus preventing the passengers from knowing what was going on.
    "Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be." Frank Zappa. ----------- "The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike." Huang Po.----------- "A drowsy line of wasted time bathes my open mind", - Ride.

  11. #11
    Senior Member oshta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iranu
    When your car was invovled in a fatal crash, the windscreen would turn a pleasant shade of blue, thus preventing the passengers from knowing what was going on.
    Word

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