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Thread: Who needs a blog to rant !

  1. #1
    Administrator Moby-Dick's Avatar
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    Who needs a blog to rant !



    Ladies and Gentle men of HEXUS , I propose a new bit of red tape that might actualyl be of some use to people. Not only will it enrich the lives of the majority of the country , it might help stem the raise of so-called "rage based" attacks.


    The Trolley Licence

    If you are too small to steer a fully laden trolley , consider going shopping more often or pehpas take advantage of the delivery services offered by many major supermarkerts. You have no excuse for attempting to steer something not far off the weight of a super tanker , laden down with tins of value beans for your 19 children - 6 of which are hanging off the side of said trolly like illegal immigrants on an HGV. If you can't slow it down effectivly , dont push it so fast.

    If I want a roadblock , I'll annoy some french farmers. Please learn to rest your trolley so as minimise any obstructions in the isle. Any use of trolley to block of my yellow label session will be moved. You've not paid for the food yet. Its not yours. The same goes for horizonal trolleys causing some form of wire gridlock while you talk to that women you keep on bumping into in the dole queue. You are the ones to say "excuse me" , not me.

    When you turn round , you do not need to turn your trolly round with you. Its big enoiguh and grown up enoguh to manage on its own for just a few seconds while you head back for somethign , rather than executing a sweep , mid isle , knocking items flying.

    Take a look at a ruler. See how straight the line is ? this is the sort ouf coruse you should attempt to plot. Apparently random changes of direction without looking are not freindly acts. I may be force to use the french bread I'm carrying in an equally unfriendly manor.

    Please learn to count. a '1' next to an '0' means 'Ten' , not ten different brands or "5 items , but I've just got to get somethign for our Roy's tea , its friday to day so I'll have to get him some fish". I dont give a monkey's what you or Roy for that matter like - personally I like lager on fridays , but I dont feel the need to share it.

    If you are confused by technology , dont attempt to use a self service till. Ever.

    Dont do it for me , do it for the children. Learn some supermarket ettiquette.

    Please.
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  2. #2
    HEXUS webmaster Steve's Avatar
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    Some silly cow was pushing her trolly in Tescos the other day, looking the wrong way. She started veering towards me and I literally had to dive out of the way.

    She didn't notice.
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  3. #3
    Banhammer in peace PeterB kalniel's Avatar
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    You should have let her clip you then sue for personal injury and assault

  4. #4
    HEXUS webmaster Steve's Avatar
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    No, that's just wrong. I should have slapped her around the face and told her to look where she was going.
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    Moderator DavidM's Avatar
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    Wonky trolly's should be banned.

  6. #6
    Flat cap, Whippets, Cave. Clunk's Avatar
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    anyone that runs into you with a trolley, double back and get behind them and remove their shoe while they are walking by pushing the trolley close enough to catch their heels...not only does this hurt, it makes them look foolish and they cant really kick off because they have already run into you. mwuhahaha

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    Administrator Moby-Dick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DavidM View Post
    Wonky trolly's should be banned.
    I think most of the time its the Trolly Handler , not the trolly that is at fault.



    *why not carry a small can of WD40 with you to ease those wonky trolly blues ?
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  8. #8
    Moderator DavidM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moby-Dick View Post
    *why not carry a small can of WD40 with you to ease those wonky trolly blues ?
    Probably get a friendly Police person thinking i'm going to squirt it in someones eye ...
    Last edited by DavidM; 22-09-2006 at 04:58 PM.

  9. #9
    Senior Member kickstart 1's Avatar
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    Why not avoid the supermarket all together and shop on-line? No queues, no people, no trolleys !

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    Quote Originally Posted by Steve View Post
    Some silly cow was pushing her trolly in Tescos the other day, looking the wrong way. She started veering towards me and I literally had to dive out of the way.

    She didn't notice.
    LOL! Funny! Sounds like a traffic accident!

    Oh yeah, and our local asda is god damn crazy. Everyones always rushing around looking in the wrong direction they're pushing, and trying to multitask by grabbing a 24 pack of walkers at the same time.

  11. #11
    HEXUS.timelord. Zak33's Avatar
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    Moby...that's very very funny

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    Sublime HEXUS.net
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    The really *great* one is where you get a couple of people with really stacked trolleys, decide to stop and chat to each other in the middle of the aisles, thus blocking any attempt to get by and continue with your shopping..

    What's really nice is when they tut at you for daring to interrupt their obviously engrossing conversation in a polite attempt to get past..

    Don't even get me started about the hording idiots when it gets near Christmas, because obviously the shops aren't going to be open for a whole 24/48 hours..
    (\__/)
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    F.A.S.T. Butuz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moby-Dick View Post


    *why not carry a small can of WD40 with you to ease those wonky trolly blues ?
    Lol - you can tell the boy owns an S13

    Butuz

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    Drop it like it's hot Howard's Avatar
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    I propose a similar license for 4X4 vehicles.





    Quote Originally Posted by Steve View Post
    Tescos .
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    On the same subject, why do people take their entire family to the supermarket? Oh and the pick up and drop off point is always full of parked cars.

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    Senior Member Tumble's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Howard View Post
    I propose a similar license for 4X4 vehicles.







    But when I had mine I drove it very responsibly, and the one time I caused a jam behind me I was very apologetic and remorseful...

    my accelerator cable broke and I had to chug up a hill on tickover.. in the lo ratio 'box to not stall...


    sorry everyone

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