Tech Support Joke

[typz_007]

That is funny. And thanks for the bash link there's some right funny ones in there

[Iain M]

like the IRC one

[JK Ferret]

Some others off the bash one...

tetris is so unrealistic

<@Terror> "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield."
<@cky> opposite over hypotenuse
<@cky> dip****

<samsim> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo
<samsim> and got mauled
<samsim> and people were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage
<samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent
<samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

<Axe> I
<Axe> do
<Axe> not
<Axe> know
<Axe> where
<Axe> family
<Axe> doctors
<Axe> acquired
<Axe> illegibly
<Axe> perplexing
<Axe> handwriting;
<Axe> nevertheless,
<Axe> extraordinary
<Axe> pharmaceutical
<Axe> intellectuality,
<Axe> counterbalancing
<Axe> indecipherability,
<Axe> transcendentalizes
<Axe> intercommunications'
<Axe> incomprehensibleness.

<Meph|st0> Complaint : BOUGTH IT FOR MY COUSIN WHO HAD CANCER, ITEM NEVER ARRIVED AND MY COUSIN DIED
<Meph|st0> thats the greatest ebay feedback i have ever seen

<Sabdo> on one of those speech-to-text programs my friend ripped ass onto the mic.
<Sabdo> and it typed out "France"
<Sabdo> we were like, wtf?

That one is hilarious, i swear i was out for 10 mins or so

<green> We vegetarians love the environment. carnivores are sick freaks.
<Frank> How can vegetarians possibly love the environment.. you keep eating all the effing plants

[tiggerai]

OMG the plants one... that's it, not more work is being done this afty!

[Hans Voralberg]

OMG the plants one... that's it, not more work is being done this afty!

LOL remind me that tig is a vegetarian

[finlay666]

im so sticking bash on when i get back into uni after skyving one of my lectures

(its the last one technically and the guy is a short angry bloke....we think he is angry because he is really short and shares an office with a guy who is like 6'4"......they are like the odd couple )

[tiggerai]

LOL remind me that tig is a vegetarian

I'm not as far as i kno! Where'd you get that idea from? I thought that plants one is wicked!

I'd die if I was Vegetarian!

[MadduckUK]

htid is our resident veggie, there may be more but he's the one that comes to mind

[Hans Voralberg]

I'm not as far as i kno! Where'd you get that idea from? I thought that plants one is wicked!

I'd die if I was Vegetarian!

Oops sry not you, some other girl, keep confusing you girls lol Cant remember her nick though

[chicken]

(morganj): 0 is false and 1 is true, correct?
(alec_eso): 1, morganj
(morganj): bastard.

That one is excellent!

the "Saying that Java is nice..." one's funny too, but I won't post it on here!

[Dareos]

#178890 +(9780)- [X]

*** Now talking in #christian
-Word_of_God- Welcome Abstruse to #christian I am a Bible Bot. For more info type: /msg Word_of_God !info
<Abstruse> !kjv numbers 22:21
<Word_of_God> Numbers 22:21 -- And Balaam rose up in the morning, and saddled his ass, and went with the princes of Moab. - (KJV)
*** SageRider sets mode: +b *!*@c211-30-208-111.rivrw3.nsw.optusnet.com.au
*** Word_of_God was kicked from #christian by SageRider (Please dont Swear)
<Abstruse> I know I'm never going to be able to come back in this channel again after this, but damn was it worth it to see that...



and

TN]FBMachine> i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section

and
#120296 +(7450)- [X]

<link>once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot xxx galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered, " give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.
<hokage> *cries*, scary....


pure quality

[Dareos]

there are funnier ones, but not ones i could possibly quote here

[Whiternoise]

My faves are the ones like:

<@AntiHeiss> friend of mine went to jail last night
<@AntiHeiss> he probably isn't getting out for a while
<%The_Coolest> y?
<+Enyo> why?
<%The_Coolest>
<@AntiHeiss> it was a girl cop, she was pretty cute too
<@AntiHeiss> she said anything you say can and will be held against you....he sat there for a while and said 'tits'

WallJam7: roses are red
WallJam7: violets are blue
WallJam7: all of my base
WallJam7: are belong to you

<knightmare> sixtho I challenge you to IRC DDR!
<sixtho> ummm ok
<knightmare> + ddrbot start 10
<DDRBot> Game Started!
<DDRBot> <
<knightmare> <
<sixtho> <
<DDRBot> ^^
<knightmare> ^^
<sixtho> ^^
<DDRBot> vvv
<knightmare> vvv
<sixtho> wtf
<DDRBot> knightmare wins!
<knightmare> ?
<sixtho> where the **** is the down arrow
<knightmare> ...

[chuckskull]

[Howard]

Heh, I love bash.org

[h4x3r920]

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Llollll