Ethernet cable. I *promise* this just happened.

[Workaholic]

^^ I got it, and OP Mike Fishcake, the same thing happens in a lot of retailers near uni campus (I know Maplin on Oxford Rd, Manchester) get similar questions once every 2 hours or so....

^ spill morejokes out...

[MadduckUK]

yes please, more anecdotes, always good for a laugh

[bigblue]

Trying to think of the funniest ones. They were usually just when people were unbelievably mad. In that zone I mentioned earlier. Mostly golfers

Think one of the best ever was when someone was trying out a club in our shiny new demo room. Inside, at one side you have a big heavy duty hitting net, with a green carpet (fairway obviously!) leading towards it, with two tee set-ups (one near the left and right walls, for left and right handed golfers) both aimed into the aforementioned net

At the other side there was the doorway, PC and all the techie swing monitoring stuff, a TV, couple of chairs and a plasterboard wall with a famous golf print across it. Behind that was the shop floor.

We sent a chap in to try a club, thinking it was all fairly self-explanatory. Not so. Two minutes after he went in there was an almighty clatter and the clock on the outside of the demo room fell of the wall. We didn't know what it was until there was another bang and a ball flew out of the demo room doorway and into the shop.

We ran into the room, and this right handed golfer had set himself up in the left handed bay, so he was facing in the opposite direction to the (not exactly difficult to spot) 9ft net. It didn't actually occur to him, as he merrilly twatted balls towards a giant print, TV, PC and water cooler that maybe, just maybe, there was something wrong.

There was an almighty dent in the print where his first one had hit but thankfully he'd missed all the electric gear. He knew there was something wrong by the look on our faces. He tried to explain by saying "I was kinda wondering about this, but the tee is facing this way." We turned him round and set him up in the right handed bay and he turned more beetroot than the beetrootiest betroot you've ever seen

[MadduckUK]

hahaha, i kind of guessed where that was going halfway though, but classic nevertheless

[EvilWeevil]

All of these are genius

My major shop faux pas, as I am told, was when as a toddler I asked the shop assistant if he "had horny balls".

Apparently I was after a space hopper

[bigblue]

There's many more, but some are even more ridiculous and I'm wary of posting them in case it's coming across like B/S. People who've worked in shops probably understand where I'm coming from, but I've just been telling the missus some of the stories and she thought I was having her on.

And also maybe people are just being polite when they actually want to tell me to shut up and stop waffling

Just in case there's any impressionable children out there, this is in no way a positive endorsement of working in retail 99% of the time it sucks ass ! Just say no kids !

[MadduckUK]

There's many more, but some are even more ridiculous and I'm wary of posting them in case it's coming across like B/S.

don't worry, weave got a globe-trotting billionaire with a woman in every city around at the mo () so nothing will be taken as bs

also: i can remember all those stories from the girl who worked at the video store in the states before blogging was called blogging so ill know if youv copied anything

also again: does anyone have a link to an archive of em? they were really good

[Vowo]

The Manager in Maplins didn't get my joke

me: hand him a £20 for an item that costs £2
he: anything smaller
me: nope, but I can give my best joke a go
he: go on then
me: I can fold it (the note for you to make it smaller)
me:

can't beat the oldens'