HEXUS.debate - the Friday debate

[Nick]

Just a thought, how many of those of you that have already expressed an opinion are parents and how old are your kids?

[Splash]

Not a parent myself, but would certainly be interested in that info too Nick

[Gunwitch]

End of the day the parents were irresponsible for leaving their children alone and unattended. No one in their right mind should do this.
I never leave either of my 2 alone unless i'm in the house, and then i make sure they're safe before even going to the loo. If i go fill up the car with petrol, i take them with me to pay. Maybe i'm paranoid but thats the way i keep an eye on my kids.

Something about this just doesn't smack right. There aren't enough questions being asked the parents, and i hope to god they feel like hell for leaving the children alone.

I hope to god they find her soon and safe, but this is the real world and i can't see that happening i'm afraid. As for seeing the pope, yes wellit's easy to make yourself look good isn't it. They didn't even take their other children as has been said. Why not?

There are thousands of children that go missing, sold into slavery etc, but you don't see that plastered all over the news unless you look for it. Maybe if the forces concentrated on actually looking for her instead of appearing in front of the camera they might get somewhere.

Personally kill every single child molester publicly and in a painful way.

In answer to your question Nick, i have 3 children 15 yrs who lives with her mum, 3 yr old and a 8 month old, all girls

[Brucelles]

OWhat makes Maddy special?

She's so pretty and cute. No normal person can not look at her and want to protect her from whatever happened to her.

[ikonia]

I'm not comfortable watching the father on TV - something about him doesn't sit right with me.

I've also read from a non-verified source that a business man offered approx £2 million as a reward for her return, the father wanted this put into a "madelline fund" to be used to help find her, the business man refused and said it was for "reward only" so the father turned it down. I don't know if there is any truth in that, but that seems very odd to me.

[Dareos]

No kids here myself, but i do know that my parents never left me alone at that age, nor would any of my family's children be left alone at home for more than a few minutes at a time (cot time excepted) never mind in a strange country

[[GSV]Trig]

One 4 year old, not mine but partners via a previous relationship.

Not sure what your getting at tho Nick, would you go to a resteraunt down the road and go back every 30 minutes to check on the kids?

[EvilMunky]

I'm not a father but am about to be - and at this stage, cant imagine doing that. Especially if there was a creche service available.

I also find it a bit disturbing that at cinemas (i saw shrek 3 th other day) they have the Maddy advert on. I found that wholey inappropirate. I didnt have kids with me, but i could see plenty in the cinema and whilst i agree in awareness, i dont htik young kids should be exposed in that level to this sort of information.

And i also agree with some other comments - the family isnt quite rihgt...

[pollaxe]

I think when you have kids of that age you have to be with them virtually all the time - my family looks after a 4 year old girl (she's been visiting since she was a few weeks old and I love her to bits) who's into everything and moves everywhere at about 60 mph - and it's just something you have to accept and do. It's not for long (the period where you have to stay with them nearly all the time).

(I'm not a father, more an adoptive uncle!)

[Carlh]

I also think that something isnt quite right here:

If the parents were chavs I might be able to understand why they left the children unattended whilst they went for a meal, however both of the parents are well educated therefore they really should have known not to leave the children unattended.

Also as there was 3 children in the room at the time it makes no sense why only one was taken.

I wouldnt wish the scenario on anybody - and I have an 18 month old son of my own and I would never even think of leaving him alone in the house unattended.

[mallett]

i agree with the majority of the posts on here that the parents have to take a large responsibility for this but i don think that they deserved it as to be honest no one does, no matter who they are. this must be the most traumatic experience a parent can go through as its the waiting that will hurt them, not knowing what has/is happening to her has to be terrible! however i dont understand the thinking behind leaving their 3 yr old child alone in the hotel room while they were eating, i mean thats bad enough if its in their own house but on holiday is just plain madness!
i dont have any children myself but my parents had 4 kids within 6 years and they would never dream of leaving any of us alone, even if just for a few minutes.
in my honest opinion i dont think they will ever see maddy again, which is very sad but i just think that after this amount of time she is either gonna be far too well hidden or dead.

as for the media coverage, its just insane how one kid gets taken and theres all this coverage, why is she so special? how is putting ads in the cinema before every film going to make a difference? think of the amount of children stolen every day at theres not a blink of media coverage on it, it really does make me sick!

[Carlh]

One 4 year old, not mine but partners via a previous relationship.

Not sure what your getting at tho Nick, would you go to a resteraunt down the road and go back every 30 minutes to check on the kids?

I know I definatly wouldnt.

I live directly opposite the partners parents, I wouldnt even leave my son alone even if i was directly across the road at there house so I know full well I wouldnt go for a meal and leave him

[Nick]

Trig, there's no mystery at what I'm after, bud.

I just think that it's very easy to make judgements on something like this without fully comprehending what it's like being a parent.

It's very easy for everyone to make moral calls on this but the only way to know exactly how you would act as a parent is to be a parent.

And now, what I'd like to make clear is that I'm not defending either side of the argument, I'm merely saying that before anyone goes off wildly speculating they need to do a fair bit of soul searching and figure out if they can, in all honesty, have an opinion on something they've no experience of.

And on that note, I'll give you my opinion on this:

Leaving their kids in a nearby apartment block was not, with hindsight, the cleverest thing to have done. But from very early on after Madeline went missing, it came out that this is something that holidaying families have done on a regular basis. So it's fair to say that there was no reason to believe that the kids wouldn't be perfectly safe.

If it were me I wouldn't have done this, but that's me.

However, I do leave my kids at home if I'm just nipping to the shops or the post office... if I'm only going to be gone for five minutes. Anything longer and I take them with me.

You see, when you're a parent you're invariably busy all the time, it's just how it goes and you accept it comes with the territory of being a parent. And for sure, if my kids were younger I wouldn't leave them alone for a second.

But mine are 11 and 7, so a quick nip to the corner shop for a tin of tomatoes is fine. It's quicker for me to nip out than to muck about finding shoes and coats, loading the kids in the car and strapping them in and all that malarkey... never mind the inevitable argument in the shop when the youngest spots the latest Disney mag...

But, and this is purely a personal point of view, if I was on holiday with the kids, they'd come everywhere with me and most certainly if I was going out for a meal I'd take them too.

So I suppose that I have to fall on the side of thinking that Madeline's parents were irresponsible and now they've paid a terrible price.

But I do feel that this sort of discussion is something that should take place after there's been some sort of resolution.

[Splash]

But I do feel that this sort of discussion is something that should take place after there's been some sort of resolution.

While I do fully understand your point I personally think that enough time has passed since her disappearance . As others have said - the outlook is grim, and it's looking grimmer by the day but there's no guarantee of any kind of resolution. This neatly brings me on to my next point - at what point does the publicity machine scale down? How long can the trailers at the cinema, the front pages of the tabloids etc reasonably continue?

I understand that I may sound like an unfeeling troll, but were I in the McCann's shoes I think I'd be seeking some sort of closure by now, and the need to get back to normal life (or as normal as can be in the circumstances)

[pollaxe]

Unfortunately if it's anything like the Ben Needham case it may be a very, very long time (if ever) there's a resolution to this.

[kickstart 1]

I dont know if i have missed it in any of the reports, but has anyone seen the mother show any emotion ? Most parents are in floods of tears , but i have only ever seen her stand, straight faced and silent.