cover letter help (motivation booster!)

[jackvdbuk]

currently lost the motivation to search for jobs considering a few anchors holding me down but i have just typed up a quick cover letter and will try the next few days.

i have a common assault charge and i feel really awful about it (bad bad time of my life)
no references, well they will say i was dismissed... (again bad part of my life!)

no unhelpful comments please, really struggling here! when i applied and told them about my record, they say "im not suitable" or not reply so from now on i am not putting it down on apps... otherwise i will never ever get a job.

anyway here it is, is it OK?

Dear ____
I noticed the job vacancy for ____ on _____. I have two years retail experience in a busy cinema and the vacancy seems to suit my skills which are noted in my CV. I enjoy working with people and always strive to make the customer happy something which I can do in this job you are advertising. I believe my positive and hard working attitude is useful in a retail environment and I am always willing to undertake further training to better my performance at the workplace.
Please find the attached CV and do not hesitate to contact me via phone or email.
Yours sincerely,
Jack _____



thanks guys

[jimbouk]

Looks good. Nice and positive.

Re lack of references, might be worth trying to pin down the manager where you're applying for a quick informal chat when you're handing over your CV. Personal opinions have huge sway in decisions like this so if you can convince them what a great guy you are rather than just hoping for a response to a CV (in a tough job market) then it's well worth 5 minutes of your time.

Re common assault charge, I assume this isn't spent then? (Disclosing convictions) Tough one, I'd leave it until asked to give you the best chance, though you do have to be truthful. If you've given the best impression prior and appear repentant/reformed then it's just down to whether they're prejudice affects the decision.

I know it doesn't help pay the bills, but voluntary work could beef out your CV or open doors to new opportunities if you're looking for a different type of job.

Finally good luck and don't give up!

[CaptainCrash]

The letter's fundamentally fine, I just tidied up the layout, spelling and grammar a bit:

Dear ____

I have noticed the job vacancy for ____ on _____, and would be very interested in applying for this position.

I have two years' retail experience in a busy cinema, and this vacancy seems to suit my skills, as noted in my CV. I enjoy working with people and always strive to make the customer happy, as I would hope to demonstrate if my application is successful. I believe my positive and hard working attitude is useful in a retail environment, and I am always willing to undertake further training to better my performance in the workplace.

Please find attached my CV, and do not hesitate to contact me at your convenience via phone or email.

Yours sincerely,

Jack _____

I tried not to change it too much, as it's your letter and not mine.

[jackvdbuk]

you guys are really great! thank you will apply for a load of jobs with that cover letter and cv .
cheers

[Domestic_Ginger]

Quick reword; it may be worse but one thing to improve would be to put some big flashy and most importantly positive words in it. Definately get rid of noticed in the first sentance. Making customers happy sounds a bit odd. Perhaps enjoying the interactions with customers or satisfying them? No matter which way i word it it sounds like prostitution!

"i wish to put forward my application for the postion <insert details> as advertised <insert details of where you ssaw the advert>. I posses two years experience in the retail industry and thrive in an environment where i am able to interact with customers. I am keen to develop and learn new skills that would improve my performance.

I am available to start as soon as possible upon successful interview (or such) and I look forward to your reply,
Yours sincerely,
Jack _____"

[CaptainCrash]

I don't necessarily agree - the original letter might not be "conventionally" worded, but it did have a hint of freshness and individuality (admittedly some might see it as naivete) which I didn't want to lose. And I liked the "make the customers happy" bit...

I do appreciate that there's an accepted form for these things, and if in doubt you should probably take the conservative approach, but whenever I've recruited in the past, my eyes would glaze over at the standard form letters, and they all tended to blend into one another (particularly the ones that used the same old "power" words over and over and over and over ad nauseam).

I guess yer pays yer money and yer takes yer chance, as in so much else...

[pollaxe]

I think either form posted by you chaps looks quite effective. There's some very good advice on here.

Yes, a good positive letter and I'd agree about the charges, don't mention them unless asked or specifically required to list them. Good luck and cast the net wide.

[Domestic_Ginger]

Individualism is good; I couldn't agree with you more there. Its just so hard to get into writing.

EDIR! Just noticed i used environment twice! made a couple of changes.

[oolon]

The first thing is, don't tell people information they do not ask for. (I learnt that one about long hair) you think you are being open and helpful and that will be respected, WRONG! It just puts people off and you might not get your foot in the door to wow them at interview. Clearly if they ask about convictions you have to tell them, these kind of things are normally on application forms, so apply for jobs were you can send a CV that way people often will not ask. Second references, simply say... references available on request and leave it at that many firms never ask for references I have had some firms bother my references before they even interviewed me (My stated reason for not including them). Thirdly, get references from HR departments they are neutral and for legal reasons they cannot say more than X days sick, Y give a written warning for Z. Verbal ones do not say on your permanent record. Finally salary, say what your aiming for not what you are on. Many companies will not give you a bad reference as legally they could be at risk if they prevents you from getting a new job.

I got a job with a company before they asked me for a CV (had been a contractor there), after I had started they asked for my CV! Always wondered why? because it was not like they could object to the contents as I was hired before they saw it.

Edit:

If you have no references do some volunteer work. After a few months you will be able to ask for a reference as to how you worked, also volunteer work can often open the door to a real job in the same organisation. Volunteer work can also start to cover the hole in your work record.

[leonkehoe]

What job(s) are you applying for, can you be more specific? Then we can tailor your cover letter accordingly. As it stands it's too generic and won't be as effective.