thoughts on dogs...

[scottyman]

Spent all Sunday afternoon playing with a 7 month old Golden Retrevier - and this came through on e-mail this morning.

> The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead
> of his tongue.
> Anonymous
>
> Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you
> are wonderful.
> Ann Landers
>
> If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where
> they went.
> Will Rogers
>
> There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
> Ben Williams
>
> A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
> himself.
> Josh Billings
>
> The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
> Andy Rooney
>
> We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can
> spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man
> has ever made.
> M. Acklam
>
> Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people,
> who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.
> Sigmund Freud
>
> I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious
> cult.
> Rita Rudner
>
> A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three
> times before lying down.
> Robert Benchley
>
> Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current
> events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing all kinds of
> late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially urgent,
> are often continued in the next yard.
> Dave Barry
>
> Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
> Franklin P.. Jones
>
> If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I
> have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
> James Thurber
>
> If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.
> Unknown
>
> My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a
> can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
> Joe Weinstein
>
> Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come
> back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken,
> pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
> Anne Tyler
>
> Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax
> and get used to the idea.
> Robert A. Heinlein
>
> Speak softly and own a big, mean Doberman.
> Dave Miliman
>
> If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not
> bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man
> Mark Twain
>
> You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a
> look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
> Dave Barry
>
> Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
> Roger Caras
>
> If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your
> pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.
> Phil Pastoret
>
> My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I
> am.
> Unknown

[Rob]

Some good'ens there mate.

Particularly like

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.

So true!

[nichomach]

"The best friend a man has in the world may turn against him and become his enemy. His son or daughter that he has reared with loving care may prove ungrateful. Those who are nearest and dearest to us, those whom we trust with our happiness and our good name may become traitors to their faith. The money that a man has, he may lose. It flies away from him, perhaps when he needs it most. A man's reputation may be sacrificed in a moment of ill-considered action. The people who are prone to fall on their knees to do us honor when success is with us, may be the first to throw the stone of malice when failure settles its cloud upon our heads.

The one absolutely unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous is his dog. A man's dog stands by him in prosperity and in poverty, in health and in sickness. He will sleep on the cold ground, where the wintry winds blow and the snow drives fiercely, if only he may be near his master's side. He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer. He will lick the wounds and sores that come in encounters with the roughness of the world. He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were a prince. When all other friends desert, he remains. When riches take wings, and reputation falls to pieces, he is as constant in his love as the sun in its journey through the heavens.

If fortune drives the master forth, an outcast in the world, friendless and homeless, the faithful dog asks no higher privilege than that of accompanying him, to guard him against danger, to fight against his enemies. And when the last scene of all comes, and death takes his master in its embrace and his body is laid away in the cold ground, no matter if all other friends pursue their way, there by the graveside will the noble dog be found, his head between his paws, his eyes sad, but open in alert watchfulness, faithful and true even in death."

Senator George Graham Vest, 1870

[DaBeeeenster]

The only joke I ever remember. Sort of dog related.

What's the difference between a dog and a fox?






About 8 pints