Karaoke

[Rave]

I was gonna post a long essay about my childhood singing history. I re-read it and- who cares?

Long story short (and it still isn't really), Sunday is Karaoke night at the all-inclusive resort I've just been on holiday to. On the first Saturday I completely overdid it on the inclusive booze and finished the night by falling up some stairs and smashing myself up. On the Sunday I finally got out of bed just in time for dinner. The entertainment laid on by the resort for that evening was Karaoke. During dinner my wife's cousin suggested that we do a duo on Live And Let Die. Feeling absolutely screwed, and still drunk from the night before I took him at face value.

The standard of Karaoke once we'd finished dinner was pretty execrable. Despite not having sung in public for 15 years I was sure I could do better. Even though my wife's cousin quickly bottled out I, through a mixture of residual drunkeness, misplaced confidence and desire for public humiliation signed up to do Live And Let Die without even considering whether it was actually a suitable song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JK2hKzZss5Y

Turns out that, TBH, it isn't.Without the fireworks, it comprises three bursts of vocals, with very long musical interludes inbetween, during which you can either dance like a rubbishrubbishrubbishrubbish or stand still like a lemon. The second break is so long that after 50s I thought I was done and chucked the microphone back just as the final chorus started. I then quickly snatched it back and finished the song.

Result: massive cheer from the bar.

So the next Sunday I thought I'd actually do a song I knew, and knew I could sing from start to finish. I chose Does Your Mother Know by Abba. And as I'm up on stage preparing to belt it out, the backing music comes on- the backing music to Take A Chance On Me. Now that's my all time favourite Abba song, and in all honesty my falsetto is probably sweeter than my tenor, but I'm not a drag queen and it wasn't going to happen. I shut the MC down and went away with the book to choose another song.

When I saw Birdhouse In Your Soul by They Might Be Giants I was straight up there. I've been singing that song to myself since I was 15 and I truly love it. So I jumped up and introduced it with "I hope we've got some fans of the pretentious college rock here".

Trouble is that when I sing I sound like myself- a South East Londoner. The They Might Be Giants singer sounds like himself- a nasal New Englander. So I got up and nailed the song in my best nasal singing voice- lapsed into SE London accent a few times, but I didn't miss a note or a word, I was on a massive high when I finished. And I got the most perfunctory round of applause you've ever heard. I sat down and then the rest of our holiday group asked me "what the hell was that song you sung?". They'd never heard it before, and I daresay neither had anyone else of the 200-odd people round the bar. The session ended before I had a chance to redeem myself- probably for the best, for through sheer conceit I was considering doing Since You Been Gone. That would have been a real embarrassment.

But anyway, I'm hooked now. Anyone else a karaoke fiend? And if you are, can you actually sing?

[Gerrard]

That's a great song. I used to call it the "Bee in your Bonnet" song though when I was younger! Even reading the lyrics, still have no real idea what the hell the song is about; blue canaries and lighthouses, although do like the verse: -

There's a picture opposite me
Of my primitive ancestry
Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free
Though I respect that a lot
I'd be fired if that were my job
After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts

[Blitzen]

2 Years ago i entered a competition on holiday and sang 'Build me Up Buttercup'.
The competition ran all year.
I won and got a free holiday for the following year

[mmh]

when i went to egypt 2 years ago i got up and did kareoke in a competition and won... i think i did let me entertain you by robbie williams as i used to sing that in a band and knew i could belt it out

[MadduckUK]

all the booze in the world wouldn't get me singing

[schmunk]

That's a great song. I used to call it the "Bee in your Bonnet" song though when I was younger! Even reading the lyrics, still have no real idea what the hell the song is about; blue canaries and lighthouses, although do like the verse: -

There's a picture opposite me
Of my primitive ancestry
Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free
Though I respect that a lot
I'd be fired if that were my job
After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts

It's about the Spanish civil war.

[funke_munke]

Well working in a rough-as-nuts valleys pub, we have kareoke on a Sunday and Thursday (Thursdays edition is called 'Bargoeds got talent'), during which I am quite often called upon to sing. Gets me a break from work and a bit of a laugh. Now, being a man in a band and such, I tend not to like singing other peoples songs as I'm so used to singing my bloody own. So I tend to pick the rap tracks that no one ever does in kareoke - my special at the moment is "California Love" by the legendary 2pac and Dr Dre. Although tonight I figure I'd do Straight Out of Compton - Bringing African American music to the valleys! People tend to look bemused then love it

[Rave]

There's a picture opposite me
Of my primitive ancestry
Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free
Though I respect that a lot
I'd be fired if that were my job
After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts

Yes that's my favourite bit.

Although tonight I figure I'd do Straight Out of Compton - Bringing African American music to the valleys! People tend to look bemused then love it

Good call, classic song. I might do that if I can find a suitable venue. Tho Easy E's verse is a bit gash.

[Knoxville]

There's lots I know the words well enough to knock out but I'm no singer, I had to threaten the last pub I did karaoke in into applauding after a horrible rendition of pinball wizard, never again.