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Thread: 16 men on a dead man's chest

  1. #1
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    16 men on a dead man's chest

    There was a funny article in PC Gamer this month which made chuckle. It's little things like this that make WoW worthwhile. For those that don't buy PC Gamer, I've reproduced the article below.

    You won't know who to feel more sorry for. The transcript below records an encounter between a WoW Pirate guild and the world-weary GM TELLARI, who has just teleported them from the centre of town into the depths of a forest. This is a disciplinary act. The GM caught the guild using the scenery and architecture of Booty Bay to reap experience without danger, and now she wants to tick them off. Wonderfully, the pirates insist on staying in character throughout.

    A group of pirates are standing, looking around, adjusting to their new surroundings. SALEEN, ARNIE, and others led by MAJ. Fluttering behind MAJ is a parrot.
    MAJ: Har!
    ARNIE: Har! Magic!
    ARNIE: We done got moved.
    Enter TELLARI, stage right, TELLARI is a gamesmaster Mage, responsible for policing WoW.
    SALEEN: Har lubber!
    ARNIE: Avast ye swab
    TELLARI: Ladies and gentlemen, what you are doing is against the policies we have set forth.
    ARNIE: What that be?
    MAJ: Har!
    GALEXIOUS: What policy ye be speaking of lass?
    TELLARI: Attacking players from positions to which the guards cannot path is against our policy.
    TELLARI: Plain and simple this is not appropriate behaviour and if I see it again I will be making sure appropriate action is carried out.
    ARNIE: They can get up easily. Thar be a ramp.
    TELLARI: No, the run up when you bring them.
    TELLARI: Shooting from atop the tower will not cause them to come to you.
    LOZZT: We be killin dem lubbers fare and square.
    LOZZT: What about da rogue lubbers keelhaulin dem scurvies on da ground?
    KOTLAS: Need to get yer eyes checked lass, plenty o guards be runnin' up after us.
    TELLARI: You can PvP on the tower, you cannot attack people on the ground from the tower.
    TELLARI: Does everyone understand?
    ARNIE: Sure as sure, lubber. Yer da boss.
    TELLARI: I am waiting for you all to state you understand….
    SALEEN: I be understandin', ya wench.
    MAJ: We be a crew, in'n one of us understand it be da rest understandin'
    MAJ: Now free us 'n' be on your way, lass
    KOLTAS: Aye
    ARNIE: A right fine wench
    PC Gamer issue 150 July 2005.

    Now to get a pirate hat and a parrot Aarrghh!, a right fine wench

  2. #2
    TiG
    TiG is offline
    Walk a mile in other peoples shoes...
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    Thats not the full thing tho.


    [Maj] says: Har
    [Arnie] says: Magic
    [Saleen] says: Har Lubber!
    [Arnie] says: Avast ye swab
    [Loxos] says: u lubber.
    [Tellari] says: Ladies and Gentlemen, what you are doing goes against the policies we have set forth.
    [Arnie] says: What that be?
    [Maj] says: Har
    [Galexious] says: Can ye explain yerself?
    [Koltas] says: What policy ye be speakin of lass
    [Tellari] says: Attacking players from positions to which the guards cannot path is against our policy.
    [Saleen] says: be clear lass
    [Arnie] says: They can get up easily...Thar be a ramp
    [Tellari] says: No, they run up when you bring them.
    [Arnie] says: Bah
    [Arnie] says: We cleared tha guard spam
    [Tellari] says: Shooting from atop the tower will not cause them to come to you.
    [Maj] says: Fair enough lubber
    Arnie spits on the ground.
    [Tellari] says: Plain and simple this is not appropriate behavior and if I see it again I will be making sure the appropriate action is carried out.
    [Maj] says: now free us'n be on your way lass
    [Tellari] says: Does everyone understand?
    [Galexious] says: go get us some ale wench
    [Arnie] says: Sure as sure lubber
    [Koltas] says: Need ta get yer eyes checked lass, plenty o guards be runnin up after us
    [Arnie] says: Yer da boss
    [Saleen] says: aye wench
    [Arnie] says: Me poppet
    [Lozzt] says: Avast ye swabby
    [Loxos] says: We kill them all ,
    [Arnie] says: So we can't be pvpin on flight towers
    [Tellari] says: Is there something the rest of you are not clear about?
    [Slak] says: Den we can be der as long as we let dem come to us?
    [Arnie] says: Dat be makin a lot o sense
    [Maj] says: Yar
    [Lozzt] says: we be killin dem lubbers fare and square
    [Tellari] says: You can pvp on the tower, you cannot attack people on the ground from the tower.
    [Saleen] says: make with tha dancin
    [Arnie] says: Gotcha
    [Arnie] says: We'll stick ta tha tower
    [Maj] says: Thak ye lass
    [Arnie] says: Can ya put us back up der?
    [Tellari] says: No.
    [Maj] says: Har
    [Arnie] says: Oh dat is nice
    [Arnie] says: We
    [Tellari] says: I am waiting for you all to state you understand...
    [Arnie] says: be appreciatin yer help
    [Slak] says: what about da rogue lubbers keelhaulin dem scurvies on da gorund?
    [Maj] says: Wot is dis, ye release da crew or ye be walkin da plank
    [Arnie] says: Aye. We understand.
    [Galexious] says: Erm i need some drink
    [Arnie] says: Damn lubbers be always cryin n'whatnot
    [Maj] says: We be a crew, ifn one of us understand it be da rest of us understandin
    [Arnie] says: Buncha fancy lads
    [Galaxious] says: Lass, stun us up some bartendress and send 'em dis way
    [Kozzt] says: da captn speaks we be a follin his orders
    [Saleen] says: i be understandin ya wench
    [Arnie] says: Tellari I says, Der be a prince amongst princes
    [Arnie] says: A right fine wench
    Kolstas raises a drink to Tellari. Cheers!
    [Loxos] says: she lokking fine
    [Arnie] says: Queen o'tha damn seven seas

    Saleen thinks Tellari is a sexy devil.
    Saleen whistles at Tellari.
    Loxos flirts with Tellari.
    Arnie spits on Tellari.
    Saleen whistles at Tellari.
    Koltas spits on Tellari.
    [Maj] says: She'd make a good deckswabber if'n ye ask me
    [Nebulis] says: I understand wench, release me
    [Hairi] says: be spoil all da fun lubber
    [Hairi] says: aye I be needin a few more deckmonkies
    [Arnie] says: After dis go fetch me some grog
    [Tellari] says: It would not be wise to spit on a GM...
    [Arnie] says: I be thirsty
    Saleen is terribly bored with Tellari.
    [Koltas] says: Need ta make sure o yer policies lubber
    You spit on Tellari
    Koltas spits on Tellary
    Galexious spits on Tellari
    Slak spits on Tellari
    [Arnie] says: I spit where I please
    Nebulis spits on Tellari
    [Maj] says: shove off lass
    [Maj] says: ye be done here
    Saleen spits on Tellari
    [Arnie] says: It's a priate sign o'respect
    [Koltas] says: Next time we gonna make ye walk da plank
    [Koltas] says: backwards


    Thats better

    TiG
    -- Hexus Meets Rock! --

  3. #3
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    Mine's the full transcript from the magazine, but yours is funnier. and now I want to be a pirate even more. Hoist the mainbrace and set sail for adventure!!
    Last edited by Beach; 10-06-2005 at 08:59 AM.

  4. #4
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    i pee'ed myself reading that!

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