Reason's to Love your Sh1t Heap

[Brucelles]

On the original, presumably Nikasil, engine? No sulphur at all in European petrol then?

No, the cylinder sleeves were replaced under warranty before I bought it.

[Brucelles]

Since this thread's resurfaced and it rhymes with heap...

It's rubbish! But it has a 4.0 stright 6, so I don't care

It's rubbish at most things, but on a sand dune it's brilliant. I owned one for 8 years in Abu Dhabi and it was perfect for the job of carrying two dogs, a cooler, three people and some other gear over some of the hairiest dunes I have seen.

[Smudger]

I've got a 2000 W Pug 406 Exec HDI 110. It's done a number of miles, but I'm not sure how many, as the speedo head was replaced at some point. I inherited it from my Dad when he got a new car, so it doesn't owe me anything. Still gets 40mpg around town (5 miles each way to work) and up to 55mpg on a run, depending on how heavy footed I am. Surprisingly, the things that have gone wrong haven't been electrical, mainly wheel bearings, the aircon system, and the fuel pump. Oh, and a couple of new clutches at £500 a go... The main, really important thing, is that it's got a 'comes as standard' JBL amp and speakers. Which is quite possibly the best setup I've ever had in a car, and is probably the reason I haven't traded it in yet... That and 'er indoors telling me I don't need a new car...

[Brucelles]

My E38 740i just went up in a cloud of insulation smoke and I had to send it to the scrapheap in the sky. I used to leave it parked for weeks at a time in the south of France and I guess it just rebelled.

So I thought, why not buy a cheap POS to run while I am down there? I needed a current MOT, but that was the only prerequisite. I looked at a MB 300D with 650,000 Kms on the clock, but even I don't believe that would last long, so I bought a real lump of dung. It's a Renault Clio 1.9D from 1993. It's done 330,000 Km and the seats are covered with old curtains and are still falling apart. It's top speed is about 140K/h, but I seriously doubt the speedo is accurate.

The windows are all hand wound, there's no a/c, the windscreen wipers stop wherever they were when you turn them off, there's no central locking it won't even run my nice music system. It's a genuine piece of merde. It looks as though it has been kicked unconscious, it's so covered in dents, and it's a dull grey, like lead pipe. It has a sunroof, but it's sealed shut with mastic.

However, I can drive over ploughed fields in it without it rattling. It has a tow-hook for my trailer and it will tow a ton and a half of logs uphill to my village without complaining. It has apparently lived outside for all of its life, so I can leave it at the station and avoid taxi fares every time I visit. I have no idea how much fuel it uses, as I have only done 450km in it and the tank still reads full. My BMW would have been half empty by now, and that had a 100 litre tank. It has had a recent MOT (Controle Technique) and all of the lights work. It's almost certainly thief proof, as it's not worth the effort of opening the doors to steal. Insurance is cheap, fuel cheaper, and I have a guaranteed buy back price that ensures that I can't lose more than €100 per year, but I will return home to live next year and buy a Range Rover and and an SLK anyway. It's inaccurate to say that I love it, the way I did my old BMW, but I do give it the respect I would an old dog that still barks and chases rabbits, despite farting too much.

[bledd]

I picked up a Vectra B for £200, it's sole purpose was a nicer way to travel from Cardiff to my parents house (110 miles) as a replacement for getting the train. I walked to work, so didn't need a car, but it was so nice not having to get the train when going home every other week to see friends from home etc.

In 6 years, all it had was a new set of tyres and some brake pads (at the start of the 6 years). The one fix that I did to it was make a new idle control valve gasket, I made one from a Wheetabix box because I was too tight to buy a real one. Turns out they cost about 80p anyway . The rear wiper rusted out, silver duct tape blended in well with the silver paintwork.

Bought an Integra to replace it, but I do still miss the old car

[Konan555]

It's rubbish at most things, but on a sand dune it's brilliant. I owned one for 8 years in Abu Dhabi and it was perfect for the job of carrying two dogs, a cooler, three people and some other gear over some of the hairiest dunes I have seen.

Yeah, a lot lighter than most 4x4s!

And the motor takes some abuse. A lot of offroaders pack up, crack heads and blow rad caps at the first sign of a sunny day.

OK, the jeep might blow the cap if the rad's silted up, but it'll carry on anyway!

[CocoPops]

Good post Zakky

My first shed...... lol
Was a mk1 rusty, oil blowing 13yr old volkswagen golf, and boy was she good!! My first car, I crashed her, abused her and she still kept going. I paid £175 for her and it was the best £175 I spent for a long time. YRC 832Y did me proud.

Then I sold the golf and bought a lovely mk2 Fiesta Ghia 1.4 from a granny, exactly the kind of car I'd love to buy a gain, 14yrs old, immaculately maintained. D22UGM, or Dug-em as we called her.

I part ex'd the fiesta for my first real hothatch, a 1994 (6yr old at the time) Toyota Starlet 1.3 GT Turbo. I loved that car, and tbh its the car I most regret selling Small, unassuming, yet very rapid! L46 MBL, my first and only foray into the Japanese import market.

Almeras you say? I had 2, a mk1 phase2 (with the nicer rear lights) 1.4 5dr and she was lovely, got me from a-b, didn't grab attention but did the job. S46 NBW was a good car to me

Then I p/ex her for a brand new 2.2 TDi Almera (current shape), one of my motoring mistakes First of all, someone drove into the back of it when it was parked and it cost 5k to fix (it was only 3months old) then when I got her back after 4months in the bodyshop, I lost control of her on a black icey bend and ended up in a ditch.. write off. I'm sure LC02CCX was jinxed.

Then I decided to be sensible and bought a 2.2tdi Primera, you know the one, current shape with the fancy satnav and reversing camera! I kept OE51UWO for a short while before becoming bored with sensible cars and part exchanged her for my first clio 1*2.

My first Clio 172 was a lovely flame red example, bought as a 1 owner car and I really enjoyed her... for the short time I had her. I think I owned her for 6months? before part exing against a brand new 182 that I got an offer on I couldn't refuse. So KY03TXG became...

KK04XLP, a brand new Artic Blue 182 Clio. I loved this car also, in 11months I put 33000 miles on the clock and loved every one of them.

I then bought a westfield, with the idea of having 2 cars, one sensible and one fun.

Unfortunately, the westfield only lasted 2 weeks from registation to write off! Q816 GFD was written off because of a little oik in a fiesta that came round a bend all crossed up and ended up tagging the rear of the Westy and spinning me 18degress down the road. I was unhurt, the westy with only 500miles on the clock was written off.

Using the money I got back from the westy, which was slightly more than I paid, allowed me to buy my pride and joy... HT51HLD, that later became V22LAC... A Lightning Yellow Ltd Edition VX220! That car taught me sooo much about driving, I owe her a lot.

Going back to the 1fun car/1 sensible car, led me to buy a brand new (with staff discount) Nissan Micra 160sr, RV55 NSY to complement the VX220. I put 27000 miles on this car in 18 months.

Then in the last month, I sold the VX220 and part exhanged the micra against my latest pride and joy...

A 2005 Honda S2000, 240bhp of screaming vtec 2.0 engine!! A stunning combination of Moonrock (Met grey) with Red and Black leather interior.

Next.... who knows.... Stay tuned, I'll be sure to post it on hexus!!

oly Thread revival!

Update.....

So the Honda S2000 last from Feb 2007 until Dec 2007 when I sold her Was a great car, took me plus "MobyDick" to Le Mans and back. Think I did around 10k miles, of which they were quite varied.

To tide me over from the S2K to the next car, I bought a shed... £100 bought me a P reg
Fiesta 1.25 What a machine. It had already had a fairly hard life... was a friends girlfriends car who clearly applied makeup in the car... as the controls were coated in it.
P553 MOP aka PI$$ MOP lasted me well, from Dec 2007 until March 2008 when my current rocketship arrived.

KU08GNN, affectionately known as Cougan. I was after a new MK5 golf, spec'd up to what I wanted 18" wheels instead of the standard 17s, Xenons, Centre Armrest, Highline computer etc. However, I had the chance at a Silver Edition30 on staff purchase (15% off) so I jumped at the chance. Only thing I went without (it was already spec'd and on the production line) was the Xenon headlights.

So fast forward until now and she's running somewhere in the region of 320-340bhp with quite a few torques She's been remapped, had a turbo back exhaust fitted, an ITG Intake System, Sachs full coilover suspension (that I won in a magazine competition!).

I started putting quite a few miles onto the Ed30 around Janurary... was working in Chester so had some weeks where I was doing 700-800 miles a week. This has slowed down now... I bought a 2nd car to share the load...

So, In July 09, I bought GY54UPK.. A blue smart roadster.
A complete difference to the golf. 80bhp of 3 cylinder turbo power.
With a gearbox system you either love or hate, it's a manual box controlled by computer and servos. A semi automatic if you will. This means it changes the same speed as a manual gearbox, but because it's "automatic" you get complainers saying it's not instant enough.
However, drive the car and lift the accelerator at the same time you would in a normal manual car and its very rewarding.
Great spec, central locking, leccy windows, leccy roof with lift out side bars.

And thats me right now, my Ed30 and Roadster.
Should see me through for now. Don't quite know what the next car is gonna be, but I do quite fancy the VW Bluesport Convertible as and when it arrives...

Time for another update....

So, the Golf Ed30 got put back to standard and part exchanged for a 2007 MX-5 Mk3 2.0 Sport. I bought it March 2010 and by May 2010 had been lowered, had a oversteery geometry setup and I completed my first track day with Lotus on Track at Silverstone Stowe circuit. I was asked by no less than 3 lotus owners what I'd done to it... some very surprised looks when I said it was standard bar some lowering springs :reckon: BT07JFY (became V22LAC as was common for this plate to be on my sporty cars VX220, S2000 and Golf Ed30)

The Smart then got sold and I bought a sensible Ford Focus as my misses was pregnant and was due in December 2010..... BT55JXY then became V33LAC as I bought a corresponding plate to go with V22LAC.

I kept the Ford Focus from May 2010 until March2011 when the realisation that after 3months with the twins... that a focus wasn't big enough! So I got all sensible and bought a Volkswagen Passat 2.0 Diesel DSG Estate WK58WY then became V33LAC as I part exchanged the Focus.

As for the MX-5, well I still kept that until August (just a few weeks ago) when I took it to Anglesey for a VX220 Trackday... uh oh... I wanted a VX220 again, Even tho the MX-5 really did itself proud by showing up some VXs but it couldn't compete with the SuperCharged or Turbo cars.

So, the latest addition to the 'Pops stable is a 2003 VX220 in Solid Yellow... standard for... hmmm not long Plans are afoot to SuperCharge it, which should see it around 250bhp or just under 300bhp/ton. Yes, the VX220 formally HT03YZS will soon be known as V22LAC, so the V22 plate will be back where it started, on a VX220

So in summary, Since the start (1996):
1983 Golf 1.1
1986 Ford Fiesta 1.4 Ghia
1994 Toyota Startlet GT Turbo
1998 Nissan Almera 1.4
2002 Nissan Almera 2.2 Sport+ (New)
2002 Nissan Primera 2.2 SVE
2003 Renault Clio 172 2.0 Sport
2004 Renault Clio 182 2.0 Sport (New)
2005 Westfield 2.0 SEiW (New)
2001 Vauxhall VX220 2.2
2005 Nissan Micra 160SR (New)
2005 Honda S2000
1993 Ford Fiesta 1.25
2008 Volkswagen Golf GTI Edition 30 (New)
2004 Smart Roadster
2005 Ford Focus 1.8 Ghia
2007 Mazda MX-5 2.0 Sport
2008 Volkswagen Passat Estate Highline
2003 Vauxhall VX220 2.2
(Some have been concurrent, like Passat+VX now)

Thread revival time!

So, the Passat did me from 2011 until Sept 2014 when it was replaced with a brand new Audi Q3. Pretty decent spec, ordered new on a 64 plate, registered as KX64LYH although I will out one of my LAC plates on there soon enough.

The VX did indeed get supercharged, with 261bhp it was a proper toy. Saw me through a dozen or so track days, including Le Mans, Spa Francorchamps, Brands Hatch, Anglesea etc etc.

The vx was sold earlier this year and replaced with a 2010 Lotus Evora in Solar Yellow.

So since last update, another two cars added to my list

[Zak33]

since this began I have worked for two mainstream car manufacturers, and driven literally hundreds of thousands of miles for them in a multitude of new cars.

But in that time, between jobs, and quite in need of a car, I had need of a loaner.. and I was loaned .. very kindly, by Rave.. a mk 1 Pug 106. My heart was stolen.

Years later.. he let me buy it and rebuild it.

now.. in 2015.. it's in my garage.. brand new (I kid you not.. it's brand new now)

and my missus has a J plate Honda CRX Del Sol VTEC .... so we still hold the olden as golden

[cheesemp]

I never owned a nice car... Sigh...
H reg 1.3 Austin Metro - Loved it. Could throw it around corners and had a lot of fun driving it
M reg 1.1 Rover Metro - Not as nice as the 1.3 but still pretty nippy
S reg 1.6 Skoda Felicia estate - Didn't like it at all and cam belt snapped on the a303 on the way to a job interview
03 plate Peugeot 206 2.0 Hdi - Lovely car to do my 70 miles a day in but hit 100000 miles and fell apart (including almost losing a back wheel).
60 plate Hyundai i20 1.4 Auto - Really dull but reliable and cheap. Needed a cheap nearly new auto after I started getting leg cramps. Just paid it off and can't wait to replace it however the Wifes 10 plate Astra is more in need of replacement currently... Also having just becoming a dad I can't see the money being available for something nicer any time soon.

[Knoxville]

Reasons to love my heap..... I didn't have a heap when this thread was started, no that I do there are many, too many....

Firstly it will put up with me working on it, which most modern cars wouldn't for very long. Put it this way, when Clarkson goes for a box of hammers to fix something it's funny, for me it's probably part of the Haynes manual description. This makes the sort of heavy handed behaviour for which I'm known necessary instead of a trait that would ruin every plastic clip and fixture on something else.

Which brings me nicely to my second point - The engine is so agricultural that it will do a few hundred miles with no oil, vacum leaks, a distributor cap held on with gaff tape and not even sneeze about it. It's not fast or powerful, but it takes some killing.

It also lives up there in similar rarified air to that of original Mini's and E-Type Jags in that it is almost universally liked and respected. The compliments it gets are nice, the fact that everyone will let you out of junctions or wave you on by is even nicer and the way I can park it anywhere and not have it messed with is about as nice as it gets.

It has taught me things about vehicle maintenance and driving as a whole. When you have no assistance on your steering or brakes, big weight, no power, no traction in the wet out of four wheel drive and no computers to sort all of that out for you, you learn things

Also, as I discovered again this year, it doesn't like failing MOT's. Every time I drive it into the test centre it attracts an audience of tyre kickers and camera phones who poke and prod and snap away, expecting abject failure no doubt, yet two years running it's gone through first time. There are two Land Rovers twenty years it's juniour that live on the same driveway and can't say that about themselves.

Finally... It is one of only two vehicles I've ever driven that puts bus drivers on the defensive. Which given the way they bully traffic around here, I rather enjoy

[Zak33]

I never owned a nice car... Sigh...
H reg 1.3 Austin Metro - Loved it. Could throw it around corners and had a lot of fun driving it
M reg 1.1 Rover Metro - Not as nice as the 1.3 but still pretty nippy
S reg 1.6 Skoda Felicia estate - Didn't like it at all and cam belt snapped on the a303 on the way to a job interview

maaaan you got your stuff upside down .... Metro nice? Don't blame Skoda for the belt snapping.. it's the owner (/points)

HOWEVER.. you DO love a **** heap... zero doubt about that

[cheesemp]

maaaan you got your stuff upside down .... Metro nice? Don't blame Skoda for the belt snapping.. it's the owner (/points)

HOWEVER.. you DO love a **** heap... zero doubt about that

Please don't compare the skoda to the Metro it was seriously dull to drive unlike the 'tro's which were super fun to throw around at such a low weight. The skoda being heavily and long was like a driving a barge afterwards. As the for the cam belt - yes it was probably my fault but my dad gave me the car and I'm sure he told me it had just been done. He swears he told me it hadn't. Either way I was still pleased to be rid of it.