You have to love spam mail...

[Zadock]

I get plenty of spam


Belangrijk!


Belangerijk! Stuur door!

Hallo iedereen die Hotmail gebruikt! dit is gewoon een test om te zien wie zijn e-mail account wel gebruikt en om al de niet actieve gebruikers te verwijderen. Dit zal Hotmail veel makelijker en sneller te gebruiken maken voor alle wel actieve gebruikers. Nu wat je met deze e-mail moet doen, Alles wat je hoeft te doen is deze e-mail door te sturen naar minstens 15 contactpersonen. als je deze e-mail niet doorstuurt 48 uur nadat je hem hebt gelezen, dan word je account defenitief verwijderd.

Van Meneer Jhon Henerd

Hotmail Admin. Dept.

.....................

this is the best one of all



TREAT AS URGENT AND CONFIDENTIAL‏
From: mr.abedi Amara (mr_abedi17@yukubu.net)
Sent: 17 November 2008 23:56:07
To: mr_abedi17@yakubu.net

TOP SECRET

I am Mr. Amara Abedi, the director in charge of auditing and accounting section of Bank of Africa, Ouagadougou Burkina faso West Africa. With due respect and regard, I have decided to contact you on a business transaction that will be very beneficial to both of us at the end of the transaction.

During our investigation and auditing in this bank, my department came across a very huge sum of money belonging to a deceased person who died on 31rst january 2000 in a plane crash and the fund has been dormant in his account with this Bank without any claim of the fund in our custody either from his family or relation before our discovery to this developement.

The said amount was ( EIGHTHEEN MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLERS.($18,000,000.00)Meanwhile all the whole arrangement to put the claim over this fund as the bonafide next of kin to the deceased, get the required approval and transfer this money to a foriegn account has been put in place and directives and needed information will be relayed to you as soon as you indicate your interest and willingness to assist me and also benefit your self to this great business opportunity.

Infact i could have done this deal alone but because of my position in this country as a civil servant (A Banker) we are not allowed to operate a foriegn account and would eventually raise an eye brow on my side during the time of transfer becuase i work in this bank. This is the reason why it will require a second party or fellow who will forward claims as the next of kin to the bank and also present a foriegn account where he will need the money to be retransferred into on his request as it may be after due verification and clarification by the correspondent branch of the bank where the money will be remitted from to your own designation bank account.

I will not fail to inform you that this transaction is 100% risk free. On smooth conclusion of this transaction, you will be entitled to 40% of the total sum as gratification, while 60% will be for me. Please, you have been adviced to keep top secret as i am still in service and intend to retire from service after we conclude this deal with you.

I will be monitoring the whole situation here in this bank until you confirm the money in your account and ask me to come down to your country for subsequent sharing of the fund according to percentages previously indicated and further investment, either in your country or any country you advice us to invest. All other necessary vital information will be sent to you when i hear from you.

I look forward to receive your email .
Yours faithfully
Mr. Amara Abedi

Ha ha! I've had that one to!

I keep getting spam offering me cheap rolexs and breitlings at the moment to.

[Powderhound]

Proabably a hoax, but my favourite is:

Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA

Dear Mr. Sir,

REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.

In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.

Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.

Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.

Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.

Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number 234 (0) 9-234-2220 only.

Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
tip@nasrda.gov.ng

http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/

[dave87]

That last one made me laugh.

'His space was taken by return cargo'.

Oh, and the nasrda site is 'Not yet configured' Odd for an organisation that can pay $15,000,000 in wages.

They really didn't think that one through did they?

[Million]

It was the opening line, "Dear Mr. Sir" that got me!