Helpdesk Users

[Apex]

Rtfs.......

[rs990]

A few months back a colleague of mine had to talk somebody through mapping a network drive over the phone (as he was unable to connect using remote access software).

The share the user wanted to connect to was at a share with a location similar to \\server\share, so we thought it would be easy to talk the user through mapping to it.

After 20 minutes of talking to the guy, establishing that his user account had the correct permissions and his PC was on the network, my colleague assumed that the user must have been consistently making spelling mistakes. He finally asked the user exactly what he was typing in.

"B, A, C, K, S, L, A, S, H......" On the recording of the call you can actually hear my colleague thumping his desk.

[Richie]

Just had one 2 mins ago from someone wanting to connect a mobile and a PDA via bluetooth and part of the convo went like this -

Me - "ok we need to connect the devices together using bluetooth and this is called pairing so can you go to the bluetooth manager of the PDA and get it to scan for devices"

Them - "thats strange, it hasn't found anything, could this have anything to do with me switching the bluetooth off on the mobile ??"

Me -

[directhex]

<customer> i'm not happy, this dvd drive isn't working
<me> right, so when you put the disc into the top drive, what happens exactly?
<customer> top one? i was putting it into the bottom one. does it matter?
<me> yes. that one's the cd writer. the other one's the dvd drive
<customer> does that make a difference?

:|

[Allen]

It's nice to hear you guys really ripping the piss out of people who aren't PC literate and actually need your help... I mean, how crazy is it that someone who knows nothing about computers should try and learn how to use them or ask people for help!!

[Elmo]

I was just thinking the same. Not everyone knows alot about computers, to some they're a huge mystery, and the only thing they know how to use is word. Yet the only way they can really learn is to ask, yet if they ask tech "SUPPORT" they just rip it out of them.... thats hardly fair now is it?

[directhex]

the problem is that people are blithering morons. i'm all for helping those who ask for advice, i dish out more free advice than i care to (considering how near the end of my overdraft i am), but if day-in, day-out you deal with people who are incapable of understanding simple concepts, then you begin to lose sympathy

not understanding the correlation between movement on a screen based on your movement of a mouse places you on par with dogs but below pigs on the animal kingdom scale of inteligence.

putting a dvd in a cd drive instead of a dvd drive is equivalent to a toddler putting peanut butter sandwitches in the video recorder. if the toddler does it, it's irritating and cute. if a grown adult does it, it's pathetic and disheartening.

[Russ]

Al, Elm, there not being PC litterate, and being dumb.

lesson yesterday

me "ok, you have a 2 minute break, dont go to the shop,but you can run to the loo"
eejit 1 "can we go to the shop?"
me "no i just sed, u cant goto the shop, but you can got to the loo"
eejit 2 "can we go to the loo?"

i mean, some people.

and PC Support in our office, april fools day.

PC Support Bloke "you must have installed third party software on here to get a prompt box saying that"
me "no i didnt"
PCSB "yes u did, ill get head of System Support to take a look"
2 mins later
Head PCS "you have defintaly installed 3rd party software"
me "this pc doesnt have an internet connection"
him "you used a cd"
me "your right, its right there, next to the cd drive that this pc DOESNT HAVE"
him "look son, i know more about computers than you, dont mock me"
me "do you know how the 'Printscreen' button and Paint.exe work aswell?"
him "yes?"
me "...worked it out yet..?"
him "yes, but fix it now"


i mean, seriously its not some people who arent PC litterate, its EVERYONE who i speak to :/

[Allen]

Hmm, sorry, but I don't see where you are coming from. I work in an accounts dept with a large group of women who know NOTHING about computers, except how to do their job. If something goes wrong, they need some help to fix it. That is what IT support is there for right? I mean, if everyone knew everything about computers, then you guys wouldn't have jobs would you?

Also, they know nothing about cars, but would you take the piss if they put the wrong type of fuel in their cars? Actually, don't answer that!

[Raz316]

Ok for my example... It had little to do with IT itself, more a severe lacking of common sense. How am I supposed to help when I am given no input apart from the fact something went wrong. It's like me running to a garage and going "Something's wrong with me car!" "how do you mean?" "oooo I dunno, but something definately went wrong! fix?"

I'll admit, I do take the piss out of 'stupid' (seemingly stupid to me) support calls, but never at the user, I always try and explain and sort the problem out in the clearest way possible.

[directhex]

right, so how about if someone asked you which button on a calculator was for the number 2? you'd consider them stupid, right?

there's a difference between someone needing help, and their brain freezing up. imagine someone who can drive from A to B, but informs you they're physically incapable of driving to C because they don't know how to do that, they've never done something like that before, STOP MOCKING!

thirst for knowledge is a great thing. i firmly believe in spreading knowledge around. but if a thousand people one after another ask you to fix their coffee cup holder, aren't you gonna lose your faith in humanity?

"Where does this CD go?" "In the CD drive" "Which one's that?" "The one with a tray for CDs which is IDENTICAL to your home hi-fi's CD tray" "Nope, can't find anythign like that, the tray on this is white not black". I made that up, but i'm sure the techies in here will have heard similar before. Would I be a bad person for beating the questionner with a tennis racket? Is their brain honestly so badly formed that they can't associate two events as common? It's like being surprised that your birthday is the same day every year!

I'm not saying people don't deserve support, i'm saying MORONS don't deserve support. or jobs. or houses. or oxygen.

[Raz316]

^ Agreed, I almost tried to say that but couldn't word it! I often get the feeling people aren't even trying to understand what is going on, and yes, that can be so very annoying if you get it 50-100 times a day.

[MD]

I only get anti when they start telling you how to do something, they called you for support FFS, if they know then they should do it themselves.

I mean no harm by the things I write thast happen, of course I deal with them in the most courteous manner possible, I dunno, its just well sometime they beggar belief to us 'techies' and *generally* those here are techinical to an extent, so I guess you could say its almost like having a joke amongst fellow techies

[Jiff Lemon]

Had to once go and fix a CD drive that wouldn't read CD's.

Funnily enough it was because the machine didn't have a CD drive.

The user was pushing CD's between the gap in the two drive bays.

[Stoo]

I have zero sympathy for an end user that (in the case of the tech support that I did):

* has been sent on training courses
* had in-house training
* was given instruction leaflets
* has onscreen instructions

But then decided that they couldn't be bothered to pay any attention, or read any documentation, then they complain when the system "doesn't work"..

[Russ]

Had to once go and fix a CD drive that wouldn't read CD's.

Funnily enough it was because the machine didn't have a CD drive.

The user was pushing CD's between the gap in the two drive bays.

ROFL oh jifster!