Fighting..

[0iD]

and love is just sh*t sometimes is it not Been there, dun that one messy divorce to show for it.

Still, there IS light at the end of the tunnel. You just cant see it yet Keep looking & 'try' & stay positive.

[Moonshade]

Thanks OiD! I'll keep that in mind, I guess I know that already though, somewhere inside me..just haven't found that in me. I'm to afraid to do so .

I wish that I could be happy again, I've been depressed enough already. And I friend of mine asked me to do this depression test he found (I guess he was concerned) so I made it..

And I scored 89 out of 90..is that a bad sign or what?

It's beacuse of the thing that happened last summer, I know things are alot more positive now than they were last summer..but still I'm afraid..can you blame me?

[0iD]

Nope, I cant blame you, nobody can. It's natural to be wary. But you have friends & that is good. And because you have people to share with you'll never be alone, although it may feel that way at times. Plus there's always a last resort, us lot here

Oid's philosphical bit:
Think of it like learning to ride a bicycle. It's always wobbly & uncertain to start with & every now & then you fall off. And when you fall off it hurts. Some crashes hurt more than others & they make you more cautious. But just because you crash every now & again and you meet some idiots on the road that will try & knock you off, it just means you get tough, get wise & learn to enjoy it more. The more you ride the better u get & the more you enjoy it.

Well that's my take on life anyhow, every corner holds a new adventure, good/bad/big/small you just never can tell

[Moonshade]

Thanks for everything..remember that I said that when One bad thing happends, then a lot of other stuff comes down with it. It's never enough with One bad thing. And that is so true! Now, except the problems at home, and with the love thing. I've found out that a relative to me is gone, dead...

Why does it have to be like this? One bad thing after another, when does it stop?

[lynni]

Thanks for everything..remember that I said that when One bad thing happends, then a lot of other stuff comes down with it. It's never enough with One bad thing. And that is so true! Now, except the problems at home, and with the love thing. I've found out that a relative to me is gone, dead...

Why does it have to be like this? One bad thing after another, when does it stop?

ooops and i think ive got problems! i hope your feeling better soon hunny. have a *hug*

[Moonshade]

Thanks Lynni! *hugging* But hey girl you cannot compare like that, I'm sure that what ever troubles you is bad for you and I'm wishing you the best of luck to get rid of all the bad/stupid troubles. Keep on fighting, even though I dunno how long I can do that..I hope you'll do!

[Knoxville]

Sorry to hear about that I've lost 3 members of my family this year to cancer so i know how it feels

Unfortunatly when something bad happens a load more bad stuff seems to follow it, but there's always a break in there somewhere when something nice no-matter how small will make you smile and that moments worth holding out for

[Moonshade]

Thank you knox! Well, my sister died in cancer..even though I hadn't the chance to meet her..but I've heard so many stories about her and my father is going trough a hell because of that.

But thank you knox, for your lovely words.

[0iD]

Unfortunatly when something bad happens a load more bad stuff seems to follow it, but there's always a break in there somewhere when something nice no-matter how small will make you smile and that moments worth holding out for

Blimey, Knoxy being positive & momentaritly not depressed w00t! there's hope for us all. Sorry for your loss man, bad sh*t eh.

Sorry for your loss too Moonshade sendin u mi best fatherly type *hugs* .

[Knoxville]

*shh* don't tell anyone but i am occaisionally in a decent mood now

[0iD]

your secret's safe with me old bud

[Moonshade]

Blimey, Knoxy being positive & momentaritly not depressed w00t! there's hope for us all. Sorry for your loss man, bad sh*t eh.

Sorry for your loss too Moonshade sendin u mi best fatherly type *hugs* .

Thanks OiD..

Well, I don't know what to say. Death doesn't scare me, at least not when it comes to my own (that will come in the future)..but I'm scared when it comes to others dead. I've lost a couple of friends too, and that's so..I don't know if you can explain it in words..

For a couple of years ago (2) a good friend of mine was killed by a driver that was driving drunk! It feels so strange afterwards, I mean he was younger than me for godssake! He was only 13 years old.

And my sister died in cancer when she was 15, I'm older than she ever was..

Everything at home is a bit better though, but now I'm depressed because of the death thing. Even though she wasn't so close, it was my grandmothers sister, and now my grandmother is feeling ill too .

And still I've got my love problem, which I can't do anything about, and I don't dare to be happy. Even though I should.. everything's so complicated! Why can't it just stop? So that I can be happy again, it feels like it was ages since I could really enjoy life a 100%. It must be like 8 months ago.. :/

Well...¤trying to hang in¤