Some Jokes to lighten up your day

[gtech]

i got a new dog yesterday, but he's got no legs.


so i decided to call him cigarette..





because everyday i take him out for a drag

[Stewart]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

He was being ironic.

[Clunk]

Why didn't the ironic cross the road?

He was being chicken.

[Marcos]

---------------------

I went into Dixon's the other day, and was recognised by the assistant.
"Hey you're that mad bloke off the telly"
I said, yes, that's me.
He said, "No, you're that mad bloke - OFF THE TELLY!"
,
[/jimmy carr]

thats lee mack

[Stewart]

Why did William Shakespeare cross the road?

To invent some more words!

[monkeyville]

A: Why do they name hurricanes after women?




Q: Because they are wet and wild when they come, and take your house when they leave

[MadduckUK]

wet and wild when they come

haha, true

[Stewart]

(He read it in a book)