Cheer up.

[Disturbedguy]

Yeah I guess your right. Cheers

Apologies if I seemed ungrateful in my replies, I know you both were trying to help.

[Zadock]

Cheers for this, I know you are trying to help and give advice, and it is good advice. But I do want the friendship side of things to work, we were friends before we got together and I want to be friends with her now, if it doesnt work in time, then it doesnt work, no big loss.

I seem to have managed to stay friends with most, though not quite all, of my ex girlfriends so I believe its possible... especially when the one, and only, lass that I have ever actually loved is still my friend despite what a total sarcastic ass I was to her for a few months after we split up.

There is definitely no point dwelling on the past. What I am finding these days is that a lot of people I know are forever checking on their ex's facebook page to see what they are doing and getting all depressed if his/her life is looking more exciting than theirs... so to anyone who does that STOP IT! its self destructive + facebook is peoples lives exaggerated anyway.

[tiggerai]

Even if you want to be friends, you need to have a break for a while... re-set your boundaries, find out who you are now and get used to it... otherwise you'll never move on.

I was in a bit of a similar situation with someone this time last year... we didn't speak for 3 months so I could get my head straight, now we're really good mates - but I couldn't have done that straight away. Need time to heal those emotions

[WhiteGiant]

It's time for me to move on, hopefully find someone new and just get on with things

Not for a long time mate, you have a connection. As has been said, you need to become comfortable with yourself. There will be a long list of reasons the ex in question was attracted to you in the first place. Think about those, but most importantly think about why the relationship ended, and learn from it.

That was the most important lesson I've ever learned, I trusted implicitly, and gave 200%, never asking for anything. Turns out thats not how relationships work. Its all about give and take. If one person is totally in control, the other will be unhappy.

Please PM me if you ever need someone to talk to, I was essentially alone when I split with my ex, it is a terrible feeling. I'll do my best to respond, but I work long hours.

*edit - We need a British Velvet Lounge, seriously!

[andrep]

He'res what works for me:

Remember that everything changes. When things are good, it's inevitable they'll get bad.

But when things get bad, it's inevitable, sooner or later, that they'll get good.

It's a law of the universe, you can count on it.