If you could ask God one question ...

[pauldarkside]

Fancy a pint?

Yes please

[Spitfire01]

What's your GamerTag?

[Blitzen]

How did you manage to slip Mary one without anyone noticing?

[0iD]

How did you manage to slip Mary one without anyone noticing?

The lord 'works' (his thang) in mysterious ways

[Cov]

.
.
.

schmunk: Can we get a little more help down here???

God: Get lost. Don't bother me.

schmunk: I was just asking. There is no reason to ...

God: Oh boy, you don't get it, do you?

schmunk: Uhm, excuse me?

God: Do you really think I exist?

schmunk: ... well, you are talking to me right now, so ...

God: I will tell you something now.
For since I put you humans on earth, you develop the wildest theories which make my hair go white out of disappointment.
You just think of me as "the one" who does want you humans to do this & that ... I mean WTF ?
Who do you humans think you are? You arrogant bunch, huh?

schmunk: Phh, what could ...

God: Now you listen to me son.
You humans have nothing better to do than praying to me and committing one sin after another?
Who told you I want that? Can you folks not just get yourselfs under control again?
I don't give a damn about whatever happens on planet earth, ok.
You get out what you put in, and so far you have messed up big time.
According to my last analysis, you humans will have extinct yourselves by the year 2142.
Do you understand?

schmunk: Listen sir, it's not as easy as that for us ...

God: And why is that?

schmunk: Because ... there is a force of humans working against the good ones.
This force is so strong that the system of injustice that we have, is kept in such a tight grip.
Please sir, don't let the good ones suffer much longer because we really can't cope ...

God: Hmm, who is the force in your opinion?

schmunk: ... The governments all over the world ... and the rich.

God: The governments?? But they represent YOU. They suppose to act in the best interest of the whole and not of an elite.

schmunk: *sigh*, I know God, oh I know.
At this point little tears run down garysgold's cheek while he looked down.

God: schmunk, son ... I will give you one advise now, and that's for you to spread the word, ok.
I have equipped you all with something called "common sense". I want you to tell the whole world, that every single action you do from now on, must be done with applying some common sense..
No more greed, no more selfisch intentions, no more sick thinking.
Is that understood ?

schmunk: But ... with all due respect, I can't see that this ...

God: You will see. You will see.
Once this has taken place on a global scale, it will kick off a domino effect to your favour.
Oh, and to help you to get heard better, I will equip you with the following super power: *dramatic backround sound* ... from now on you are invincible ! ... invincible ... invincible


(God took a deep breath, turned around and looked into the far distant clouds. schmunk closed his eyes and when he re-opened them again, he was infront of his PC, still on the sevenforum's website.
He must have read Cov's posting and started to dream.)

[TheAnimus]

Asl?

[sammyc]

Why didn't you stop at Day 5?

[Steve A]

What came first, the Chicken or the Egg ???

[eshrules]

when you created the Garden of Eden, the paradise that it was, why did you ruin it by putting a female in there too?

[schmunk]

.
.
.

schmunk: Can we get a little more help down here???

God: Get lost. Don't bother me.

schmunk: I was just asking. There is no reason to ...

God: Oh boy, you don't get it, do you?

schmunk: Uhm, excuse me?

God: Do you really think I exist?

schmunk: ... well, you are talking to me right now, so ...

God: I will tell you something now.
For since I put you humans on earth, you develop the wildest theories which make my hair go white out of disappointment.
You just think of me as "the one" who does want you humans to do this & that ... I mean WTF ?
Who do you humans think you are? You arrogant bunch, huh?

schmunk: Phh, what could ...

God: Now you listen to me son.
You humans have nothing better to do than praying to me and committing one sin after another?
Who told you I want that? Can you folks not just get yourselfs under control again?
I don't give a damn about whatever happens on planet earth, ok.
You get out what you put in, and so far you have messed up big time.
According to my last analysis, you humans will have extinct yourselves by the year 2142.
Do you understand?

schmunk: Listen sir, it's not as easy as that for us ...

God: And why is that?

schmunk: Because ... there is a force of humans working against the good ones.
This force is so strong that the system of injustice that we have, is kept in such a tight grip.
Please sir, don't let the good ones suffer much longer because we really can't cope ...

God: Hmm, who is the force in your opinion?

schmunk: ... The governments all over the world ... and the rich.

God: The governments?? But they represent YOU. They suppose to act in the best interest of the whole and not of an elite.

schmunk: *sigh*, I know God, oh I know.
At this point little tears run down garysgold's cheek while he looked down.

God: schmunk, son ... I will give you one advise now, and that's for you to spread the word, ok.
I have equipped you all with something called "common sense". I want you to tell the whole world, that every single action you do from now on, must be done with applying some common sense..
No more greed, no more selfisch intentions, no more sick thinking.
Is that understood ?

schmunk: But ... with all due respect, I can't see that this ...

God: You will see. You will see.
Once this has taken place on a global scale, it will kick off a domino effect to your favour.
Oh, and to help you to get heard better, I will equip you with the following super power: *dramatic backround sound* ... from now on you are invincible ! ... invincible ... invincible


(God took a deep breath, turned around and looked into the far distant clouds. schmunk closed his eyes and when he re-opened them again, he was infront of his PC, still on the sevenforum's website.
He must have read Cov's posting and started to dream.)

Lulwut?

[Brucelles]

Wtf?

[blueball]

Why the hell did you let Tony Bliar be Prime Minister?

[mycarsavw]

Why the hell did you let Tony Bliar be Prime Minister?

That wasn't God's doing, blame our fellow countrymen for that one

[God]

What day am I going to die ?

The day your life ends.

What is it with his son and bikes?

He likes things that roll.

Why does everything taste like chicken?

Because your tastebuds are buggered.

Does Schrödinger's cat make it in the end?

He'd keep trying to climb to meet me, but is scared of heights, so would be stuck in an indefinate loop.

Can i have a spreadsheet of all of the upcoming National Lottery results, with dates, jackpot amounts, and amount of people who will win on each particular draw?

It wouldn't be much of a lottery then.

I can has cheezburger?

Everyone can has cheezburger.

If you've gotta ave wars, which I almost understand is innevitable to keep you entertained, and if you've gotta have killing... why have child soldiers?

They're actually dwarfs, and only 7 at that.

Are you really real, or is it just my schizophrenia again? I need proof.

I'm a bot.

What is the ultimate question, of life, the universe and everything?

Yes, yes, we know the answer. What's the question?

Can I has cheezburger?

Will an plane on a treadmill be able to takeoff?

Hexus seemed to forget that planes can take off vertically.

where did all my socks go?

Ceiling cat knows.

If we are all created in your image, why do you make some girls ugly?

Current reason is to keep the Bag 'N' Box Man in business.

Is there really anything more painful than a paper cut between your fingers?

Clunk's jokes.

Why did you make women so difficult to understand ?

So you couldn't hear them question why they had a paper bag over their head.

Is Santa real?

forums.hexus.net/members/santa-claus

Fancy a pint?

You'll have to come and join me. You have 43 months to go.

What's your GamerTag?

No need. I'm the server. You're my characters.

How did you manage to slip Mary one without anyone noticing?

Medicine will teach you eventually. Let's just say that fish lead the way.

Asl?

That's your 2nd question.

Why didn't you stop at Day 5?

I didn't like the name.

What came first, the Chicken or the Egg ???

The nest.

when you created the Garden of Eden, the paradise that it was, why did you ruin it by putting a female in there too?

So you could kick back with a beer.

Wtf?

Ask mummy.

Why the hell did you let Tony Bliar be Prime Minister?

Because he was better than this prat.

[scruffy]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

[Blitzen]

Why did you create a woman with only 2 funbags?